pals' split is affecting us, too.
Dear Coleen My husband and I have been best friends with another couple for over 10 years.
We've been on holiday together and are godparents to each other's children.
A few months ago the husband left his wife, my best friend, for another woman. My friend is beside herself and I've comforted her through it.
My husband has now announced that he wants to invite his friend and his new girlfriend for dinner. I've said no because I think it would be incredibly disloyal to my best friend.
But my husband has said that he's not going to lose his best friend over this.
I feel completely torn between my husband and my best friend. What can I do? Coleen says It's awful when this happens and I can see the story from both sides. When me and my ex husband split up we had mutual friends who I haven't seen now in years. It's sad but it happens when couples break up.
First of all, I would explain to your husband that, as it's only been a few months, things are still a bit raw. Tell him you appreciate he still wants to see his friend but that you're not ready to cook dinner for the woman who broke your friend's heart, especially not in your house. Tell him you will eventually, but not yet.
Then suggest he sees them at a restaurant or at their house. As for your friend, tell her that while you'll always be there for her, you have to appreciate your husband's feelings and that he doesn't want to lose touch with his best friend.
It will be hard for her but I'm sure in time she'll understand. When and if she meets someone else, things will get easier. Until then, you'll have to muddle along.