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YOUR VERDICTS.

Byline: Joan Burnie

I HOPE, Joan, you will finally recognise that there are just as many battered husbands and male partners out there as there are battered women.

But there is no help for us - no Men's Aid, refuges, TV adverts and help numbers. We're not seen as victims but wimps.

Or we're told it must be our fault. But as this guy proves, there are some women who are just as violent as men and, in fact, some are worse.

My ex did her best to emasculate me - in every sense. She once took a knife to me and threatened to cut off my genitals. She said I was so useless in bed I didn't need them.

There is also a lot of shame attached to being a battered husband. You feel, as this man does, that it's your fault.

It is five years since I found the strength to leave her but I still, literally, shake when I see her in the street.

Name withheld

I WAS in an abusive relationship myself for a few years but I never ended up in hospital or anything.

It was mostly verbal, but sometimes he would slap me and I'd slap him back. I never saw myself as a victim.

But when I started seeing the man who is now my husband and the father of my kids, during our first real argument, I gave him a slap.

He didn't hit me back. He just went very quiet, lifted his jacket and left. I was distraught. He came back and said if I ever lifted my hand to him again he would leave me for good.

I knew he was special and I didn't want to lose him. We still have our fights but they don't get physical.

Anna B., via email
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Title Annotation:Features
Publication:Daily Record (Glasgow, Scotland)
Date:Aug 22, 2008
Words:301
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