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Women's brains seem softly furnished.


NO man in the history of the world has ever, I think, uttered the words: "I think we need more scatter cushions."

Yet they are a frippery with which women are obsessed.

Take the sofa that I recently bought and on which I recline to watch a little sport on TV.

It came with four scatter cushions to which my wife added another three, meaning the available reclining space is nowhere near large enough for my somewhat tubby frame.

Thus I put all but one of these cushions on to the floor, which led to this surreal conversation with Mrs T. Me: "Isn't it better to leave them in the back room?" Wife: "But they look nice when they're on the sofa."

Me: "But no-one can fit on the settee when they're there."

Wife: "Well, put them back on when we're not using the settee."

Me: "Why?" She: "Because they look nice."

Me, exasperated: "But there'll be no-one in the room to see them looking nice."

Wife: "But someone might look through the window."

When was the last time you found anyone peering through your bay to inspect your soft furnishings, apparently a common occurrence in the world of women?

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Publication:Sunday Mercury (Birmingham, England)
Date:Jul 12, 2015
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