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Troubletown: take 2 tort reforms & call me in the morning.

IT'S AN ARTICLE OF FAITH IN AMERICA THAT FREE ENTERPRISE MAKES EVERYTHING BETTER. IN HEALTH CARE THE EXAMPLES ARE EVERYWHERE!

WE HAVE THE BEST FLU VACCINES IN THE WORLD.

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WHENEVER COMPANIES INNOVATE, SOME MISTAKES WILL HAPPEN.

WHOO! WE'D BETTER NOT MIX SUBLIMEOVAX AND PREGNANCY!

THAT'S NOT MY FAULT.

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IF WE COULD JUST THOSE BLOODSUCKERS FROM STIFLING BIO-MEDICAL PROGRESS FOR FEAR OF LAWSUITS, WE'D HAVE COMPANIES COMPETING TO GIVE YOU THE BEST INJECTIONS AT THE BEST PRICES!

ALL SUPERBONEX VACCINES COME WITH THIS GUARANTEE! LIVE THROUGH FLU SEASON OR DON'T PAY A CENT!

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IT'S ECONOMICALLY IMMORTAL NOT TO SEEK THE HIGHEST PROFITS, CHARGE AS MUCH AS THE MARKET WILL BEAR, SLASH COSTS SAVAGELY, AND SATURATE THE AIRWAVES.

ASK YOUR DOCTOR ABOUT SUBLIMEOVAX AND START LIVING FREE OF NERVOUS BOWEL INFLAMMATION!

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BUT DARK CLOUDS THREATEN THE UNFETTERED DISCOVERY OF MEDICAL MIRACLES, CAUSED BY GODDAMN SLIMEBALL PERSONAL INJURY LAWYERS!

THE PILLS PRESCRIBED TO CURE MOLLY'S DEPRESSION INSTEAD MADE HER COMMIT SUICIDE.

SCUM!

HEARSE CHASER!

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DEREGULATION AND TORT REFORM TOGETHER WILL MAKE US A HAPPIER, HEALTHIER NATION!

YOUR MOM'S IA A COMA? WE HAD A BAD BATCH OF SUPERBONEX FROM INDIA. BRING YOUR RECEIPT AND WE'LL DO HER AGAIN FREE.

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Article Details
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Author:Dangle, Lloyd
Publication:The Progressive
Article Type:Brief Article
Geographic Code:1USA
Date:Dec 1, 2004
Words:208
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