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Triangle tug o' war.

My BFF and I have been friends since pre-K, but she's been hanging with this girl who doesn't like me. How can I tell her it bugs me without making her feel she's being pulled in two directions?

Friendship triangles are tough--especially when someone involved isnt your biggest Fan. Instead of resenting the situation, talk about it. Tell your BFF you understand she wants to branch out and meet new people but that you don't want to lose her friendship. Let her know you don't expect her to hang out with you 24/7, but that you would love it if she could find the time to get together--just the two of you. If you guys can work out a balance, it will feel less like you and your friend are growing apart.

I dreamt I was kissing my best friend, who is a girl. Is that normal?

While some people are always searching for hidden meaning in their dreams, lots of times, dreams are just dreams--they don't necessarily mean squat about your innermost self. Dreaming about kissing your friend doesn't have to mean you want to kiss her in real life. It could just mean you like her a lot, or it might mean nothing at all. Unless it really bothers you, forget about it. If you're still wondering, however, you might want to talk to a counselor to get your thoughts out.

I always put off doing my homework when I get home from school. Is there anything I can do about my procrastination problem?

While it's tempting to leaf through a magazine, turn on the TV or color-code your closet before cracking the homework books, get yourself on a schedule. Allow a half hour or so to relax, grab a snack and unwind after your hectic school day. Then, hit your homework the minute your down time is up. Once you get into a groove, it will become second nature. You'll be a lot more productive, and won't find yourself avoiding those verb tenses and algebra equations.

My mom is so annoying! She would be the coolest mom if she didn't push me to be popular in school. How do I make her stop?

Let your mom know you think she's really cool but that you would really appreciate it if she would please pull the plug on the pressure to be popular. Tell her you like who you are and don't think being popular is all that. While she probably has good intentions, once you chat with her, you might find out this is more about your mom than it is about you. Maybe your morn was popular as a teen and wants the same for you, or perhaps she wasn't popular at all and wants you to have what she feels she missed out on. But popularity should never be a priority--not for you and not for your mom to put on you.

I'm 13, and my mom is way overprotective. She treats me like a baby. I'm not allowed to cross the street by myself, ride on a roller coaster or even go to the mall with my friends. How can I get a little more freedom?

Start with baby steps (sorry). If you prove to your mom you are responsible, she should gradually get comfortable allowing you to be more independent. Ask her what she'd feel OK about you doing on your own. Point out that you're not asking to go sky-diving but that you'd like to prove to her that you can do some things without her watching over you. Ask her to drop you and a bud off for a movie (G-rated, for now) and pick you up afterward. It's a start, and it will give her a chance to see that you won't abuse your alone time. Be patient while she finds her comfort level and, hopefully, she'll loosen the reins.

I've been trying to make friends with the popular girls, but I'm really shy. What's the best way to approach them?

It's great to make new friends ... but for the right reasons--not just because they're popular. So assuming you genuinely dig these girls, here's the scoop: Instead of approaching the whole crew at once, strike up one-on-one conversations--at your lockers, in the lunch line or in gym class. Initiate chit-chat about Professor Yawn's sleep-inducing tirades on Civil War cannons, or something like, "Oh, super. Meatloaf on the cafeteria menu ... again." If she laughs or pipes in, consider the ice broken. And don't forget to smile!

Got a question for Lucky? Send it to Ask Lucky, c/o Girls' Life 4517 Harford Road, Baltimore, MD 21214, or e-mail it to questions@girlslife.com
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Title Annotation:Life: ask Lucky
Author:Sandler, Laura
Publication:Girls' Life
Date:Oct 1, 2003
Words:783
Previous Article:Disappearing act: you thought you two had a good thing going. But now your new BF is just ... gone.
Next Article:Fight the good fight: conflict stinks but, hey, it's inevitable. Here's how to duke it out fair and square.


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