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Tony Parsons column: I'M A HOT PANTER.

Byline: Tony Parsons

IT'S official - hot pants are back. Friday's Mirror pictured a leggy, small-breasted model prowling down a Milan catwalk with her modesty covered by a thin sliver of something highly inflammable.

Beautiful photograph - I almost choked on my Coco Pops - but I can exclusively reveal that what that model was wearing were not hot pants. I went out with girls who wore hot pants the first time around. I have an O Level in Hot Pants Studies.

Hot pants were usually made of hard-wearing material like suede and denim. They came down a bit further than what that model is sporting. And - here's the clincher - they were often part of a larger item of clothing.

I remember hot pants frequently coming with a bib, held in place by assorted straps, buckles and buttons. Although they were meant to be a symbol of sexual freedom, hot pants were in fact the chastity belt of the Three Day Week.

Getting inside a pair of hot pants was like trying to get inside Fort Knox. What we saw on Milan's catwalks are not hot pants... those are what we call pants.
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Copyright 2001 Gale, Cengage Learning. All rights reserved.

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Title Annotation:Features
Publication:The Mirror (London, England)
Date:Mar 5, 2001
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Next Article:Tony Parsons column: Girls are boozer losers.

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