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The wife of Congressman Gerald Solomon (R-N.Y.) comments on his speech in favor of repealing the ban on assault weapons.

I'm Congressman Solomon's poor little spouse. For most of the week I'm alone in the house. My husband, the bozo, decided to tell That story to Congress, and C-Span as well. So now all the sickies will know he's away And may try a break-in - thus making my day. These sickies should bring their own funeral wreath. I'm ready to shoot and I'm armed to the teeth. I'll shoot them with shotguns, assault rifles too. My magnums and dumdums will bid them adieu. Their guts will spill out and their brains will go "splat!" The Second Amendment encourages that. The liberals try taking our guns with their laws. But we must work hard to repeal those, because Of people like me, someone's poor little spouse, Who most of the week is alone in the house.

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Author:Trillin, Calvin
Publication:The Nation
Date:Apr 22, 1996
Words:135
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