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The Loud Pipes.

BAG TAG? BAD GAS IN THE TOUR VAN? Must be the Loud Pipes, from Las Vegas. Mean, mean chops are laid down by the two guitars (Jesse and Pit), Tony gets aggro on vocals, and it's held together nicely by Roxie on the bass and Gilbert on the drums. There are liberal dashes of the right kind of metal (think Motorhead, kids), big guitar rock, and hardcore wrapped in a punk-as-luck shell, and they ain't afraid to live the rock 'n' roll lifestyle. Listen for the song that starts with a perfect rendition of the intro to the Clash's "Tommy Gun." Thus far they've got a 5-song EP that they put out themselves, and hopefully there's more on the way. Check their website ( for info and updates, llke when they're playing your scrappy town. And remember kids, don't listen to the politicians: Not everything that happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.--Wez Lundry

Do loud pipes save lives?

Jesse: No. It don't make a bit of difference when you're dead.

Tony: Yes, it makes a difference, because I can't see motorcycles in the van and we might run them over.

Jesse: Ok, the Loud Pipes save the lives of all the kiddies we play for all over the US. We're pulling kids away from the bling-bling rap world.

Why the name the Loud Pipes?

Jesse: It's mainly a reference to old cars and motorcycles. All the old cars I have, I don't put mufflers on 'era.

You guys are from Vegas? Do you hit on 13?

Pit: 13-year-olds?

What's Vegas all about?

Jesse: Sex and drugs and rock and roll and gambling and debauchery.

Pit: I thought that's what we were all about!

Gilbert: Vegas is a wide open town, and you can get away with just about anything, It's made for degenerates like us.

Tell me about your skateboard deal.

Gilbert: We're getting a bunch of skateboards made with our logo on them from a skateshop in Vegas called Madland. We'll be selling them at allour shows, and they come in different widths and sizes,

Pit: And they come fight-footed or left-footed!

Sweet: Roxie, I read something today where they called you the den mother of the band.

Roxie: They fucked that up, dude! I am so not the den mother! I'm like the bratty little bastard child, not the den mother.

Gilbert: Roxie does the e-mail, Roxie does the website, Roxie cleans up. She gives us a conscience.

Jesse: She makes us feel guilty when we fart in front of her or do bad stuff:

Tony: We're just a bunch of degenerate guys, and she keeps us in line.

What about when you guys are gettin' laid on the road and stuff?

Jesse: What happens in the van stays in the van.

Pit: She's not against us doing fun stuff like drinking, but maybe jumping in front of a train after drinking.

What's the worst show we've ever played?

Tony: Well, the story goes, I woke up and started consuming lots of things. We were in Tempe ...

Jesse: No, no, no, you can't even tell the story right. We were going to Tucson, but before we get there we decide to go to Nogales. In border towns they have farmacias.

Roxie: "Donde esta la farmacia?"

Jesse: So you can go there and buy pharmaceuticals. These guys proceeded to hang out at a bar, while Roxie and I go shopping. We come back and they're ordering shots of mescal--10 for $10. Four buckets of beers and 40 shots of tequila later, we decide to go to Tucson and play. They sleep the whole way, take more pills, smoke more chronic.

Pit: We went to go eat and sober up at the bar where we were playing, but Tony and Gilbert decided that wasn't necessary, so they started chanting "We want booze! We want booze!" So they got kicked out.

Jesse: So we end up playing the show. Tony doesn't remember the songs or where we're at. Gilbert doesn't remember either. We finish a terrible set, start taking our stuff down; Tony's wandering around like a drunk homeless man. He passed out, and halfway to Phoenix wakes up and asks when we were going to play. He thought we hadn't gotten there yet.

Tony: The only way I know the show happened is because there are photos to prove it.

Pit: The saddest thing about it is that we had a bunch of kids telling us we should be on a major label. We should be on Epitaph, that's what it was. It was at Scrappy's, an all ages venue.

Good for the kids to see that.

Jesse: Good to see what rock 'n' roll can do to your life. It ruined ours.

Pit: They must have figured that we had to be signed, because no unsigned band would do that.

Beer bongs? Or bong tokes?

All: Bong tokes!

Pit: We like to drink our beer. We actually enjoy it.
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Author:Lundry, Wez
Date:Sep 1, 2004
Previous Article:Lil' Flip.
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