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I was buffeted in the parking lot of Kohl's by the 45 mph gusts of relentlessly blowing winds that preceded the massive blue northern descending upon Oklahoma, barely saving the delicate ornament clutched in my hand. What was my 90 year old momma doing on this same day? She was hanging her clothes outside on the line to dry because, "I've done it my whole life that way and I'm not going to stop now. You know how sometimes the towels are somewhat rough? Well, they're not today. They're just as fluffy as can be," she said. She proudly explained that, "only one pillow case got away" and was eventually retrieved from the north 40.

Humor can be just as refreshing to our bodies, as the overwhelming experience of luxuriating in the smell of her freshly made bed with the sunshine, wind blown sheets. Hope you enjoy the following excerpts!

Womanly Truisms

* Blessed are those who hunger and thirst, for they are sticking to their diet.

* One of life's mysteries is how a two pound box of candy can make a woman gain five pounds.

* The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing in the right place, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.

* Time may be a great healer but it's also a lousy beautician.

* Life not only begins at forty, it begins to show.

* If at first you don't succeed, see if the loser gets anything.

* It is bad to suppress laughter; it goes back down and spreads to your hips.

* Age is important only if you're cheese and wine.

* The only time a woman wishes that she were a year older is when she is expecting a baby.

* Freedom of the press means no-iron clothes.

Two little old ladies were sitting on a park bench outside the local town hall where a flower show was in progress. The thin one leaned over and said, "Life is so darned boring. We never have any fun anymore. For $5.00, I'd take my clothes off and streak through that stupid flower show!" "You're on!" said the other old lady, holding up a $5.00 bill. The first little old lady slowly fumbled her way out of her clothes and, completely naked, streaked (as fast as an old lady can) through the front door of the flower show. Waiting outside, her friend soon heard a huge commotion inside the hall, followed by loud applause and shrill whistling. The smiling and naked old lady came through the exit door surrounded by a cheering crowd. "What happened?" asked her waiting friend. "I won 1st prize as Best Dried Arrangement." (e-mail 2005)

"Using an approach designed to involve every member of the healthcare team in conflict resolution, two nurses from Providence Newberg (Oregon) Medical Center created a quick way to diffuse a tense situation. SMILE--developed by Donell Campbell, RN, BA, and Kathi Norberg, RN, ADN--is an acronym to ensure employees are communicating with respect.

When a patient expresses discontent, try the SMILE technique:

State your positive intention. Tell your patient that you want to understand his situation and that you are willing to help.

Make the other person feel important. Reinforce your patient's feelings by telling him or her that you understand why he or she is upset.

Involve the other person in the solution to the situation. Offer your patient the chance to give his or her own solutions to the problem. Allow him or her to communicate his or her needs before offering your solution.

Let the other person know you care. Use empathy and compassion in communication. Apologize for the inconvenience and offer alternatives.

Encourage dialogue, questions, and discussion. Listen to your patient's concerns. Sometimes listening can provide more comfort than a solution.

Be sure to provide honest answers to your patient's questions." (Moyce, 2008)

Just putting your zygomatics into the shape of a smile, whether you feel happy or not, may be enough to release some endorphins. You can fake yourself into actually feeling better, by acting the way you want to be.

Formal Rules of Etiquette During a Power Outage (for the next time)

1. All clothing rules such as matching and ironing are null and void during a power outage and it is extremely rude to point out that navy blue pants, black shoes and a dark gray t-shirt don't really go together. Everything matches when it's pitch black inside your closet and nothing looks wrinkled in the dark.

2. If you are fortunate enough to have power, you should not fix your hair until all of your co-workers also have power. Nothing is more irritating to those of us with flat, straight hair than to sit next to Miss Bouncy Hair who had the advantage of a working hair dryer, curling iron, and hot rollers in a heated bathroom.

3. If your power comes back on but your neighbors has not, it is in very poor taste to turn on all 100,000 of your outdoor Christmas lights. Give it a rest. We are sitting in the dark burning our 1 remaining candle and the glow of your Christmas lights across the street is not giving us a warm, fuzzy feeling.

4. If you have power, don't ask the have-nots 'Did you see the news last night?' or 'Did you watch Law and Order? It was the best show ever.' Or 'Did you read that article in the Joplin Globe?'

5. Don't call in to work to say you're running a few minutes late because the homemade cookies in your oven are not quite done. And don't come to work without at least 2 dozen of them.

6. You power (P) people stop telling us non-power (NP) people to stay warm--What don't you understand about 'WE DON'T HAVE POWER'. There is no way to stay warm!

7. Don't be asking 'What's that smell' when you are sitting next to a non-power person. Showers are a luxury that the NP's do not have unless one of you P's wants to give us access to yours. (e-mail, 2007)

by Diane Sears, RN, MS, ONC
COPYRIGHT 2009 Oklahoma Nurses Association
No portion of this article can be reproduced without the express written permission from the copyright holder.
Copyright 2009 Gale, Cengage Learning. All rights reserved.

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Title Annotation:Humor
Author:Sears, Diane
Publication:Oklahoma Nurse
Geographic Code:1USA
Date:Mar 1, 2009
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