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Sleeping in separate rooms suits me fine.

Byline: Coleen Nolan

Dear Coleen, I've been with my wife for more than 25 years and we have two grown-up daughters. We've had the usual ups and downs that you get with a long-term relationship. However, for the past six months, after my wife had a brief illness, I've been sleeping in our spare room.

This has now started to cause some disruptions as she feels I should move back in with her because she's lonely at night. I, on the other hand, have been sleeping much better since I've been in my own bed.

I've tried to reassure her that it's not the beginning of the end of our relationship, but I'm not sure she's getting it. Also, I go to bed much later than her and like to read, which would disturb her sleep.

Ironically, our sex life has been pedestrian for years, at best, but since sleeping in separate rooms my wife appears to show a lot more interest in me. Do you have any advice? Coleen says..

If your wife is suddenly more interested in sex it's because she's feeling insecure.

I understand your point - of course you sleep better on your own.

But for years you've slept together and I'm sure your wife didn't bargain on you being in the spare room for good. I'm not surprised she's feeling lonely and rejected.

If someone's a snorer, then it's quite understandable to retreat to the spare room to get some sleep, but if it becomes a regular thing with no good reason, then she's going to worry something is wrong.

Why not read in bed in the spare room but, when you're tired, join your wife in bed? You could cuddle up in the night and be there when she wakes up in the morning.
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Title Annotation:Features; Opinion, Column
Publication:The Mirror (London, England)
Date:Mar 29, 2012
Words:299
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