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On becoming fifty --.

I was out walking with no particular destination in mind. I imagined someone stopping in their car to offer me a lift. `Where are you going?' they would ask. `Here,' I would answer, `I'm going here--and here,' I would add, taking another step. And it dawned on me in one of those epiphanous moments that:

I have arrived.

I am here and now, and never was anywhere else.

Yes, I have arrived,

Only to discover that I was here all the time

but it has taken me fifty years to discover it.

All past and all future exist for me here and now

And in all the heres and nows that ever were and ever will be.

My mind and heart still grow,

Experience and learning will teach and change my understanding.

Wisdom may be given,

and health and strength will ebb and flow

And then more ebbing to release the soul I nurture

Into its longed-for God embrace.

But I am here, right now.

I can be at home, I can set up my camp

And enjoy the sunrise and sunset.

I can put a sign outside saying `In--Permanently',

And I can work and do and create and be right now,

No more waiting.

I have learned that Heaven is here too

And Jesus.

Great Souls have left their prints here

and all of history has informed this moment, this eternal Now.

What a relief, I have arrived.

How we all loathe people who think they've arrived.

Arrived at the truth,

Arrived at the top,

Arrived materially, economically, physically, powerfully, pontifically...

And we think we see them

Casting long glances down noses stuffed with arrogance

And incapable of smelling filth or flowers anymore.

But I have arrived, here and now,

And I ask you not to despise me.

If you only knew--

Perhaps you do--beloved friends,

That now, you are all here too.
COPYRIGHT 1996 For A Change
No portion of this article can be reproduced without the express written permission from the copyright holder.
Copyright 1996, Gale Group. All rights reserved. Gale Group is a Thomson Corporation Company.

Article Details
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Author:Jean Brown
Publication:For A Change
Article Type:Poem
Date:Jun 1, 1996
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