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MORE than five million people [...]; TV critic on how non-entity celebrities humiliate themselves without realising it.

Byline: JIM SHELLEY

MORE than five million people watched the first episode of Celebrity Big Brother on Thursday, five million of them wracked with hatred and shame as they did. Our suspicions, the show confirmed, were true: this country has gone to hell.

The most damning, tragic fact about this year's line-up is that the only one who is remotely interesting (who has any kind of humanity) is Kerry Katona, a woman whose ravaged soul has been documented on endless "reality" shows already.

It's sobering that - judging by the way she greeted her - Amy Childs is someone who actually REVERES Kerry Katona.

"I don't think before I speak," Childs boasted, labouring under the idea this was a virtue.

The first half offered the iconic image of Katona, Childs, and gypsy fighter Paddy Doherty falling on the free champagne with the thirst of people who had crawled across the Sahara.

You could almost hear the cackling of the producers congratulating themselves they were right: working-class people like this will do anything for free drinks or to be on TV. It also became a who's had more botox contest: Kerry, Amy or Tara Reid? Or Brian Dowling? Worst of all was Darren Lyons, "the self-styled Mr Paparazzo", who, like all "self-styled" people was an absolute t*****. Tragic old men with wacky young men's haircuts like him or Peter Stringfellow always turn out to be self-deluded boors.

Another non-entity grasping for celebrity is Sally Bercow, just an adjunct to her already-uninteresting husband.

The funny thing is, the celebrities never seem to realise they are humiliating themselves.

They don't see they're crawling over each other like crabs in a bucket for acclaim when, actually, the more we see of them, the more hateful they become.
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Publication:The Mirror (London, England)
Date:Aug 20, 2011
Words:291
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