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Lava lout grounded; RESULT!

Byline: DEREK McGOVERN; JOHN SHAW

THE erupting volcano in Iceland has become rather tiresome, as indeed has Iceland. A huge shape spewing constant hot air and noxious gases - Mum really has gone to Iceland.

This week's European games were placed in jeopardy because of the continuing eruptions. We were banned from Europe because of the lager lout - now we're at the mercy of the lava lout. Fulham, travelling to Hamburg, face the threat of the umlaut.

We should have known that if there was a giant dark cloud somewhere in Europe, sooner or later it would reach Britain. Last time it happened I married her. Last night I scanned the skies for a glimpse of this ash cloud and spotted what I thought was a UFO. It turned out to be a plane.

Now bookies Hills quote just 5-2 UK flights will still be grounded at midnight on Friday. To most airlines that's a catastrophe; to Ryanair it's normal service.
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Title Annotation:Sport
Publication:The Mirror (London, England)
Date:Apr 20, 2010
Words:160
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