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KEOGH the CAT tall tales from the moggie world.

I FEEL for pedigree cats. I really do.

Not only do they look bloody strange (if you don't believe me, take a look at the Devon Rex) but they also have to put up with very silly names.

I'm looking at a picture of something called an Egyptian Maus who delights in the title, Mammisi Rum Tum Tugger, which is one hell of a cat collar.

Her owner must cringe when they call Mammisi Rum Tum Tugger over the Tannoy at the vets.

There are more pedigree cats than you can shake a cat at. There are Burmese, American Wirehair, Bengal, Bombay, Burmese, Japanese Bobtail, Javanese, Norwegian Forest, Russian Blue, Turkish Angora...

Is anyone else worried about the number of foreigners they let into this country? They come over here, eat our mice...

I don't understand the whole pedigree cat concept, to be honest. Isn't a pedigree meant to be the original, pure strain? On TV, I saw a really big cat with a mane felling a fullgrown buffalo. He looked like a pedigree and I'll bet no one dares call him Mammisi Rum Tum Tugger.

I'm glad I'm a bog-standard, moth-eaten moggie. At least I can go out when I want, and date who I want. Pedigrees can't pick their own partners and are whisked from one cat show to another - and those cats on the catwalk are so catty.

I told a Persian last week: "Listen mate, the country you're named after doesn't even exist anymore. You should be an Iranian."
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Title Annotation:Features
Publication:Sunday Mercury (Birmingham, England)
Date:Nov 21, 2010
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