How not to fill in an appraisal form.
There is much hilarity in the office this morning as we all fill in our quarterly performance self-appraisal forms.
It is a funny thing that when you face a group of editors with a form to fill out, everyone seems to descend into madness, myself included. It seems to be completely impossible to just fill out a form, I don't know if this is particularly limited to editors, whose job it is to fix grammar, spelling and make other people's writing make sense, or whether it is across all job verticals.
Rating things from one to five is simply not possible.
Currently there are two editors editing the performance review questions to make sense, and one who is unable to come up with job-related goals to work towards for the next performance review. Current suggestions being bandied about include smiling more, telling me to write my blog post on a more regular basis, perhaps having office cake on Thursdays, and maybe an office party. An office party that isn't an end-of-year holiday party of course. Oh and more 'duck out of work for staff bonding' days, that's also a suggestion.
Editor A has just complained that one of the questions isn't even a question, but rather it is a statement and how can he score himself on a statement. Also, limiting editors to just scoring themselves by numbers is not going well, the editor to my right, who wants to be code-named Astrid, has noted that she would like to be able to expand on the number, for example a good five as supposed to a tepid five and an explanation as to why she put a five.
Luckily this time I will not be the person going through the performance appraisals as there are a lot of non-performance-appraisal-type comments and artistic doodles. In fact, the editor to my right has drawn a very pretty star in blue pen on his form.
What is it that makes people fall apart at the sight of a form? Intelligent, articulate people who perform high-level jobs turn into jelly at pieces of paper requiring them to fill in their name and date of birth, I cannot count how many times I have filled in an entire form with blue pen, only to see the bit at the bottom that says fill in with black pen only, and why is it that the box you are supposed to sign and cannot write outside of under pain of death, is too small to fit your name in?
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