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He's rushing me into making love.

I 'm 17 and when I was a little girl my uncle sexually abused me. I never thought that I'd be able to consider having sex with a man.

But now I've found someone who is much older than me and I think I can trust him. He wants us to have sex but I'm still scared to death.

I'm sure I'll lose him for ever if I don't make love to him.

Please don't be in any hurry to prove yourself to this man. You are, after all, only 17 and he's a lot older. Sex isn't compulsory.

There are no prizes for starting early and I would advise against full sex if you're doing it for any of these reasons:

TO prove your love for your partner.

TO prove you can do it.

TO satisfy your curiosity.

BECAUSE you're afraid you'll lose him.

BECAUSE he's talked you into it.

BECAUSE he expects it.

If he genuinely cares for you he'll be prepared to wait until you're comfortable about going all the way.

I'm cut off from kids

Why does no one seem to understand how attached fathers can be to their children?

Five months ago I separated from my wife and three small children. Now she won't even let me talk to them, let alone see them.

She's changed the phone number, so all I have is letters and who knows if my children ever get them?

How can I make sure my children don't forget me?

It's very sad that your wife is stopping you from even speaking to your children. You must desperately miss hearing the sound of their little voices.

I hope she relents soon because it really isn't fair on the children, as well as being unjust to you.

There's an organisation called Families Need Fathers, concerned with the problems of keeping up a child's relationship with both parents after separation or divorce.

There are branches throughout the country and for further information you can write to 134 Curtain Road, London EC2A 3AR or telephone them on 0990 502 506.
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Title Annotation:Features
Author:Stoppard, Miriam
Publication:The Mirror (London, England)
Date:Aug 13, 1997
Words:346
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