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Guys Q&A.

I have a really hard time thinking of anything to say to my crush. We're both on the swim team, but beyond that, there's not much to talk about. Do you have any clever convo starters?

DAVE Find something that you're both into--anything to spark chitchat. If you click about swimming, surely there's plenty out there that'll keep the conversation going. You've just got to find it. Hopefully, your potential beau feels the same way.

BILL Flattery will get you far, every time. Start by complimenting his stroke or his fast time, then ease into the next topic. If that doesn't work? Maybe you don't want to hang out with a guy who spends half his life underwater, anyway.

I gave my guy friend an inside joke gift for his birthday. He messaged me to say thanks, but said I should stop giving him things. What did I do wrong?

BILL Nothing. Life can be like baseball. Sometimes you strike out. But you'll never make anything happen unless you swing. Time to look for the next good pitch.

DAVE Could he have a new GF? If so, she may be uneasy when it comes to "inside joke" presents. Going forward, be sensitive to that.

My BF of six months hasn't kissed me. My friend texted him asking if he wanted to, and he said, "IDK. We're really bad at hugging so how are we supposed to kiss?" Huh?

DAVE To be fair, you haven't kissed him either. He may be waiting for a signal that a kiss is welcome. And you may want to leave your friend out of the equation. BILL Try to give him a little peck and see if he responds. If not, you can at least know that the problem is him, not you.

My ex has been calling me fat and ugly since we broke up. Why is he doing this?

DAVE This guy's jerky behavior reeks of immaturity. Ignore him--he may be making fun of you, but when you handle the situation with dignity, you'll get the last laugh.

BILL People who feel bad about themselves are the ones most likely to criticize others. Find a guy who is confident and secure. I guarantee he'll make you feel good about yourself, too.

When my ex and I broke up, we swore we'd be best friends ... and we are. But now, he's going out with my friend, who told me she doesn't like him! I want to tell him, but will I just sound like a jealous ex-girlfriend?

BILL You've moved on with your life. Let him move on with his. If he asks you about it, tell him the truth, but I wouldn't volunteer the information. That's the difference

between a friend and a jealous ex-GF. DAVE You're right to assume you'll be perceived as the bitter ex. The ugly truth will reveal itself soon enough. Be a good friend to them both and things will work out

Dude Demystifier

I've noticed a lot of girls act clueless around guys. Does it get their attention? Do guys like a ditsy girl?

If you want to be with an authentic, sensible guy, then show your true personality. But, if you desire someone who's inauthentic and constantly putting on an act, then turn on the ditz.

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Title Annotation:relationship tips
Author:Bill; Dave
Publication:Girls' Life
Geographic Code:1USA
Date:Oct 1, 2014
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