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First things first.

I've been meaning to write about procrastination for a while. But I kept putting it off.

We all procrastinate, so I thought I'd address it.

After I've alphabetised my toiletries, course. No rush.

What's your most preposterous procrastination? When I was studying for my finals, I decided I could not delay a particularly important enterprise one moment longer - and set about polishing the tequila-stained wooden stairs. When my housemates came home and walked up the now-slippery steps in their socks, there were nearly fatalities and I had to stay up all night to cram. Still, those steps SHONE, and I think that shows rather heightened and supremely elegant procrastination skills, I thank you.

It's always when you have something important to do that you think it is more urgent to go through your undies drawer and drum out those rogue single socks

and oh yes, categorise your knickers from 'slobbing, to work, to seduction' - perhaps you should even whip up home-made dividers because there's no point tidying them just to mess them up again. And now you are not thinking about filling in your tax return at all, except you are thinking about filling in your tax return and it's making you sweat a bit and your heart race, but anyway let's concentrate on the job in hand, where is my sticky-back plastic, I'll make the dividers neon yellow. I mean, what I'm trying to say is hang on.

Sorry, I had to colour-co-ordinate the veg in my fridge, no I didn't do it just to get out of finishing my sentence, it's been top of my list for ages. Where was I? Basically, expending three times the amount of energy doing something pointless to avoid doing something important while panicking the entire time about the important thing not getting done really is up there on the list of stupid behaviour.

So wait there, let me adjust my chair, this definitely isn't the right height. Let me Google 'Perfect chair height', it won't take long

Notes on life by a Notebooker

Name: Flavia Bertolini Lives: A Londoner born and bred (despite all those vowels in my surname). About me: I own 99 dresses. I am obsessed with hip-hop and pencils (geek). I think I am well funny. Some days my hair is bigger than me.

Let us know what you think on Twitter at @notebooklive

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Title Annotation:Features
Publication:Sunday Mirror (London, England)
Date:Sep 10, 2017
Words:395
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