Dog ate my gun says murderer.
If you missed Tuesday's first episode (BBC1, 9pm), Luther''s (The Wire's Idris Elba) first case was to investigate the murder of the parents of child genius Alice Morgan.
He quickly worked out that Alice was responsible for the deaths, but the seemingly perfect crime left no evidence with which to convict her.
She'd thrust the gun down their golden retriever's throat after shooting him. Forget the dog ate my homework - the dog ate my gun wins most novel excuse of the week... well for pretty much anything.
In typical cop show rent-a-moment, the killer then turned on the investigating officer's wife - Luther's estranged wife, Zoe.
With more twists and turns than a twisty turny thing, it's a high point in the Tuesday night schedule.
Based on the Columbo template, it shows you the murder and then works its way to a conclusion.
I was just waiting for him to return with the immortal line "Just one more thing..."
LUTHER: All the ingredients of perfect TV drama