Printer Friendly

Does size matter?; Just how important is it that a man is well endowed? It's a subject that keeps on popping up. So, in a bid to sort fact from fiction, we asked seven experts on sex what they thought.. Big men face a stiff challenge.

Byline: HILARY FREEMAN

FOR years, agony aunts have been reassuring men with small penises. They say what they actually do in bed counts more than size.

But the debate rages on. Do men with giant penises have better sex?

Phallic symbols have been the image of power, health and fertility for thousands of years. It's no wonder that most men think the bigger their penis, the more macho and successful they'll be.

Biologically speaking this is a, well, fallacy; men with big penises are no more fertile or masculine than their less well-endowed brothers.

The Romans actually believed that large penises were oafish and associated with barbaric people. They aspired to the Greek ideal of elegant genitalia, neatly in proportion to the rest of the body.

Michelangelo's celebrated statue of David, created in Renaissance times, is renowned for the fact that the beautiful, Adonis-like figure sports a tiny, shrunken penis.

So IS size important, and exactly how big is "big"? We asked people who really know, from a party girl and a sex therapist to a prostitute and a man who has had his penis enlarged. Here's how they answered that all important question: Does size matter?

NO The sex therapist Lou Paget is a certified sex educator and best- selling author of The Big O (Piatkus)MEN are inherently competitive.

They walk into a room and check out who makes more, who drives a better car, who has the best-looking woman on his arm.

The problem is that they tend to compare themselves to false penis-size idols, men they see in magazines or porn films. Very few straight men have ever seen another man's erection up close. When a woman reassures a man he's normal-sized, he doesn't believe her because in his head he sees the image of a porn star's penis and he feels inadequate.

Men who think they're small are usually average. From a scientific point of view, a big penis is anything over seven inches long erect and a small one is less than four inches.

According to a University of California study of erect male penises, the average size is five and a quarter inches. And however long the penis, sensation in the vagina is only felt in the first four centimetres of entry.

Couples often say dissatisfaction with penis size is the reason they have come to me for therapy, because it's something tangible. But the true reason is usually dissatisfaction with the relationship. However, when a man truly believes his penis isn't big enough it has an impact on his sexual expression and enjoyment.

If it is damaging his sex life, I would ask him if he feels the skill and prowess of his female lover is determined by the size of her breasts.

I would advise him and his partner to avoid deep-penetrating positions for intercourse, as they often involve the woman being spread wide open. Instead they should concentrate on positions in which the woman's legs are closer together, for example, with her on top.YES The porn star

Mark Sloan, 35, has made more than 100 porn films. His latest is Weapons Of Mass SatisfactionINmy industry, it's essential for a man to be

well-endowed. A large penis looks far better on screen.

It's something men can aspire to and women can fantasise about. A large penis has always been a power symbol. I've been told that my penis measures about nine inches erect, although I've never actually got out a tape measure.

I suppose I've always been aware that I was larger than average. When I started going out with girls, as a teenager, they used to say things like: "You're much bigger than my last lover", but I assumed it was something women said to everybody they slept with, to boost their confidence.

It was only when some of my mates started saying things like: "I wouldn't get undressed next to you" that I realised I really was much larger than the norm. I class myself among the top five porn actors in the UK. In my business, the basic rule is, the longer the penis, the longer the career. I've now been doing it for five years and the work is still flooding in. I wouldn't actually want to be any bigger.

Some men are so large that they can't completely fit into a woman's vagina. Others can't get a full erection.

NO The men's sexual health doctor

GP Richard Petty is a men's sexual health specialist and runs the Weymouth Street Wellman Clinic in London

MENoften perceive that their penises are too small because they compare their tackle flaccid, in the shower room. Flaccid size is dependent on the man's mood and his environment. Feeling fear, anger or anxiety will shrink his penis, as will the cold -

it's a protective mechanism. The normal range for erect penises is between four

and eight inches. Very rarely, a man will have a genetic disorder called microphallism. A micropenis is less than one and a half inches erect, the size of a newborn's penis. But in my long career I have never seen one. Dangerous though they are, racial stereotypes about penis size do have some basis.

It is a trend for men from Asian races to have smaller penises and for men from Negroid races to be at the top end of the normal range. Caucasian men come somewhere in the middle. But this is a generalisation and every man is individual. It also has a lot to do with his genes - penis size runs in families - and his body size.

Big men tend to have bigger penises, but again there are exceptions to this rule. However, the size of a man's penis has nothing to do with his foot size or hand size. That theory has been totally discredited. Vaginas and clitorises are just as variable in size as penises.

If a small woman has sex with a big man it can cause problems: cystitis, bruising and pain. I treat several couples with this problem and it's no laughing matter.

Men with enormous penises are not blessed. If you have a huge penis it takes a huge amount of blood to make an erection, so a lot of very large men never actually achieve full erections. A man is far better off being average.

NO The prostitute

Tracy, 23, from London, has worked as a prostitute for three years. She sees four men a week and charges pounds 150 an hour INthe sex industry there are certain things that

do matter - and the size of a man's penis is not one of them. I'm more interested in the way that a man treats me and whether I feel at risk.

I usually don't even notice how big or small he is.

I just want to get the sex over and done with.

I think men tend to be more self- conscious when they're having sex for the first time as part of a relationship. With me they know they are paying for a service, so they don't care what I think about them. It's a business arrangement and they're more interested in getting their money's worth. Part of my job is to make sure the manis having a good time, so I do try to flatter them to make them feel more confident. I've only ever had one guy who had a problem getting it up and that was because he was in his 80s. One or two clients had penises that were uncomfortably large. I've just clenched myself really hard so that he can't get it in very far.

I also put my hand down there to stop him pushing too far inside. There have been a couple of men who have been quite small, but I don't care. My only worry is that the condom might come off, so I usually hold it on throughout just in case.

I haven't noticed any correlation between the size of a man's penis and the way he acts in the bedroom. All men are different. As long as they are polite and aren't rough, I'm happy. I wish men would pay more attention to their attitude instead of their size.

YES Experienced single girl

Sally-Ann Jones, 28, is a self-proclaimed London "party girl" SIZEcertainly does matter. A large penis

makes sex more pleasurable. Most women would agree. If a man has a tiny penis - four inches or less erect - I don't want to repeat the experience. One guy I was seeing was very arrogant. When we got into the bedroom and I saw his penis I thought: "Why are you so cocky? You have a minuscule penis!"

I think he was compensating for his insecurity. Now I'm very wary of arrogant men in case they're covering up a tiny willy. On the other hand, being well- endowed doesn't guarantee good sex. A man can be too big. One guy was about 11 inches and when I saw it I just went:"Oh my God."

I felt pretty scared - and sex was agony. Some large men don't make any effort to please a woman. It's sheer laziness. Others don't know what to do in bed - they assume being large is all that's needed to satisfy you. Width is just as important as length.

One of my friends went out with a guy whose penis was so long and thin that it looked like a pencil. It was a total turn-off. Of course, I'd never laugh out loud, because I wouldn't want to damage the man psychologically. I've had breast implants, so I can understand why a small man might have surgery to increase his penis. However, I wouldn't want to sleep with him. It's such an intimate place it just freaks me out.

Most women just want a nice, average-sized man who knows what to do in bed. If I really like someone and they know what to do, we can get round the fact that they have a little penis.

YES The surgeon Roberto Viel works at the London Centre for Aesthetic Surgery in Harley Street. He has performed thousands of penoplasties to increase penis size PENISsize has been important throughout history. Being big increases a man's self-esteem and self-confidence.

Very few men who come to me for a penoplasty have tiny penises. Most are textbook average: about two or three inches when flaccid and three inches in circumference. But if a man believes his penis is very small, it can have serious effects on his life. Several of my patients have stopped playing sports because they are terrified that other men will see their penis.

This is called "locker room syndrome". They won't go to the beach, wear shorts or use public urinals. Some are unable to have relationships, or their relationships end because they can't perform sexually.

Many will never let their wives see their penises flaccid.

The men who approach me are usually in their 30s and 40s, though they can be as young as 20 or as old as 70. The operation will not make the penis look bigger when erect, only when flaccid. If someone comes with a normal-sized penis and obviously doesn't have any problems, I say No. They have to have a good reason. The operation can increase both the length and girth of the flaccid penis - the girth by about one inch and the length by about an inch and a half. It costs pounds 4,000.

It's performed under local anaesthetic and sedation and patients usually go home that day. Fat is harvested by liposuction from the abdomen and injected into the the shaft of the penis. I increase the length by cutting the ligament that holds the penis to the body. Most patients say the operation has changed their lives.

It improves their self-esteem and their relationships and allows them to start having a normal life again. I'm operating on their minds as much as their bodies.YES The penoplasty patient David Lambert (name changed), 41, is an accountant from London. He had a penoplasty in 2002I'Dfelt inadequate since school. In the showers, other boys used to jibe about well-endowed classmates, shouting:"Look at the packet on that."

A large penis meant you were top dog, macho and virile. I wanted them to think that of me. But I'd look down at myself and think that my penis looked out of proportion to the rest of my body. I'm 5ft10ins, with a stocky build and 42in chest.

My penis didn't fit: it was thin and, when flaccid, too short. It didn't fill my pants or swimming trunks properly. It seemed shrunken and dried up, like an old man's. Nobody told me I was small. But when I heard girls talking about how girth was more important than length, I'd dread the thought that a woman would ever call me "pencil-dick".

For years, the problem ate away at my confidence.

I felt shy in the locker room and didn't play the field in case an indiscreet woman revealed my shameful secret. A few years ago, I read about penoplasty operations in a magazine and made an appointment to see Roberto Viel. He told me that, at 3.5 inches, my penis was perfectly normal-sized and, at over seven inches erect, I was well above average. I was very chuffed. But it didn't change my mind. I have no regrets.

My penis is now much fuller and riper-looking. I can now fill a pair of Speedos and get admiring glances! Now, if someone suggests skinny dipping I'd be the first to get my kit off. And I'm no longer embarrassed to stand at a urinal.
COPYRIGHT 2003 MGN LTD
No portion of this article can be reproduced without the express written permission from the copyright holder.
Copyright 2003 Gale, Cengage Learning. All rights reserved.

Article Details
Printer friendly Cite/link Email Feedback
Title Annotation:M Health
Publication:The Mirror (London, England)
Date:Nov 20, 2003
Words:2284
Previous Article:'Brothel Gurkhas beat me'.
Next Article:First aid fix SCALDS; Could you cope if you saw someone having a heart attack? If you spotted a car crash would you help or walk away? Basic first...


Related Articles
Problem Page: Just Joan; Should I contact ex for old time's sake?
WEEKEND: Why it's women who make the best directors; UNPLUGGED.
dilemmas; Top sex counsellor Caroline joins the Sunday Mail.
Viva!: JILL TUNSTALL AGAINST THE CLOCK.
JUGGLERS: I hope Ronaldo's missus isn't there when I go for her keepy-uppy record; ONE LOOK AT THAT GORGEOUS COUPON AND MY BID WILL BE DOOMED SAYS...
JustJoan: THE AGONY AUNT WITH ALL THE ANSWERS; I'm scared saying I do will spoil it.
Juliet Lawrence Wilson's column: Dying to get a man into bed? Read on..
'It's a shame Steve won't be around when we will really start to get those results'.
DOES SIZE MATTER?

Terms of use | Copyright © 2018 Farlex, Inc. | Feedback | For webmasters