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Do men really fall: no, don't let the brothers make you wear that fake hair.

From our infatuation with and addiction to long hair in the '60s to our love of weaves today, Black people have been struggling with the notion of "good hair" versus "bad hair" since the "Man" shipped us here to this country.

Now I am not just going to jump on the Sisters for wanting to wear these weaves. We Brothers have had our own issues with hair. Hell, I am known for sporting some crazy styles throughout my career. There is not a Brother alive who has not worn a wave cap, or if you are old-school, your momma's pantyhose tied with a knot on top of your head so you display your "natural" waves the next day for all the ladies to see.

I have used the Soul Train-recommended, Afro Sheen Blowout Kit. I've used the electric hot pick (left me with a burn mark on my forehead for two weeks). And let's not forget the '60s conk and the process that would burn your scalp so badly that your butt cheeks would clinch up and lift the chair you were sitting in.

But then came the king of all jacked up hairdos, the Jheri curl. Oh yes, it could not be wet, long or curly enough. It was truly an ugly hair period for Black America. Yes, I was an early adopter. I had one of the first curls, when it was then called a "California curl." All of us Brothers in the Midwest, where I am from, believed that all the Brothers from L.A. had good hair. We saw them on Soulllllll Trainnnnnnnn! I wanted that Bobby DeBarge-Foster SylversJeffrey Daniel-Shalamar Afro! BAM! With a Black Power fist pick stuck right at the top like a cherry on a sundae. (I later found out that the DeBarge family was really not from California but from my back yard of Grand Rapids, Mich.)

What does this have to do with hair weaves? Well, I am trying to lay out a history of why we want the good, long hair. We have been led to believe that the straighter and the longer the hair, the more beautiful we are.

Even now, when we have different choices such as braids, dreads, 'fros and the bald look, we still lean toward the White standard of hair beauty. How many times have you heard this said about a Black child who still has that wavy newborn hair? "...The Negro fairy hasn't visited yet!" That meant that it was only a matter of time before that child's hair would turn nappy.

Look at all our music videos. Every video "model" (I guess that is the "PG" term now) has hair down to the middle of her back and when they turn the wind machine on, there is 3 or 4 miles of hair blowing around that video set. I am surprised that no one's eye has been put out yet.

OK, back to the weaves. I know some Sisters wear a temp weave to let their natural hair grow under it. I understand that. I have to compliment Sisters for even being able to wear a weave comfortably. It must be like wearing a cap that you can't take off your head (paid too much money!). I actually heard one Sister say, "It felt like wearing a helmet." I don't mind that weave, I just hate certain attitudes and actions once you have all that fake hair on your head.

Here is what can no longer be tolerated when wearing a weave:

No wild head rolling to swing your weave in circle just for the hell of it.

Quit shaking your hair when it gets in your face and then say, "Girl, my hair is so long I don't know what to do with it?" or "My hair is just getting too long; I think I am going to cut it." JUST TAKE IT OUT! The only thing you are cutting is thread.

This is for entertainers: No more endorsing and doing commercials for shampoos and conditioners saying the "product" helped your hair grow and become thick and natural-looking. STOP THE LIES NOW!

Lastly, police your weave. If a piece of your weave falls to the ground, pick it up and take it with you. Don't act like it isn't yours. Keep the Earth green.

Men, we can help out in this situation. Instead of always running up to the Sister with the super-long weave and telling her how fine she is, push up on that natural hair-wearing Sister and tell her how good she looks.

Maybe we should proclaim a national "Take your weave out day." We can call it NATIONAL NAPPY DAY! I can see it now, thousands, no millions of Black women and men walking arm in arm and singing an ode to our natural hair inspired by the Edwin Hawkins Singers: Oh Nappy Day/Oh Nappy Day/When we just washed ...

Man, if we did that, it would change the world economy. Koreans would have to start new businesses in the Black community. I know, that ain't right, but it ain't wrong either. Maybe we should also put down our lotion and just be naturally ashy also. Stop, Sinbad, you have just gone too far with that one.

Sinbad is an internationally known comedian, film star and recovering Afro Sheen Blowout Kit survivor, He is currently working on an album with his daughter,
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Title Annotation:TWO SIDES
Author:Sinbad
Publication:Ebony
Article Type:Viewpoint essay
Geographic Code:1USA
Date:May 1, 2008
Words:904
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Next Article:For those weaves? Yes, wear that weave, girl. You've earned it.
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