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Critical eye.

"Never mind Britain's Got Talent. The show that had everyone talking this week was the culmination of I'm Ruining Suinsbury's--sorry, I'm Running Sainsbury's (Tuesday, Channel 4)--the supermarket's televised quest for free publicity. Oh, and the next 'big idea' that will have Tesco running for the hills.

It's been a rollercoaster ride, including one store worker's Susan Boyle-style transformation from salt-of-the-earth shelf-stacker to boardroom diva who wouldn't get out of bed for less than 5,000 Nectar points. Her idea--"It's not stalking, it's targeting"--tanked, as would any sales pitch whose greatest asset is that it is legally not the same as aggravated harassment.

This week's contender was spud-faced supervisor Joseph Showier, who patrolled his Derby mini-fiefdom with worrying intensity.

Showler pitched his idea for a dedicated area for new products to Sainsbury's execs at its Holborn corporate citadel, where they were no doubt wowed by his penetrating analysis that "saving profits is more important than making money".

Presumably Lord Sugar was tugging his beard out in frustration after he missed this dead cert.

Sadly, convenience director Dido Harding put the kybosh on his Big Pitch but instead offered Joseph n fast-track gig in Sydenham.

After apparently feeling "like Dorothy in Oz" amid the sprawl of a huge metropolitan store, Joseph struggled and was damningly described as both "unshaven" and "task-focused"--the managerial equivalent of being branded a puppy-eating paedophile terrorist.

It made uncomfortable viewing as he failed to adjust from Midlands obscurity to the bright lights of a gold-paved city where customers only want armour-piercing amino for their AK-47s.

And panic set in when Justin King pitched up for an inspection, reminding geekier viewers of when the Emperor paid a 'motivational' visit to the partially built Death Star.

Ultimately, Sainsbury's opted not to install Joseph immediately as supreme executive overlord. We'll see in due course who's lucky enough to step in long term on King's personal version of Who Wants To Be A Millionaire.
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Title Annotation:comment & opinion; Sainsbury's Supermarkets Ltd.'s customer services
Comment:Critical eye.(comment & opinion)(Sainsbury's Supermarkets Ltd.'s customer services)
Author:Wright, Charlie
Geographic Code:4EUUK
Date:Jun 27, 2009
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