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Cinemagic and cinetragic; Best and worst from the big screen's odd box.

Byline: DAVID EDWARDS Mirror Film Critic

From Minis screeching through Turin to the line, "You're only supposed to blow the bloody doors off ", The Italian Job is seen as one of the best films made.

Now the 1969 adventure, starring Michael Caine, left, has been named the "best car movie" of all time. But the 2003 remake, starring Mark Wahlberg, fared less well, with 15% calling it the worst car film, in a poll by comparethemarket.com.

Here I give you my Best and Worst movies in categories from cats to power tools and paint...

Blue Movie BEST: Derek Jarman is said to have delivered his *cough* masterpiece in 1993 with the highly experimental Blue.

With the visuals limited to an unchanging blue background, luminaries such as Tilda Swinton explored the artist's experiences with Aids. He died the following year.

WORST: In the panned Blue Lagoon (1980), Brooke Shields and Christopher Atkins learned to survive on a desert island before indulging in almost-porn.

Cats BEST: There is nothing like a moggy on your lap to make a movie villain that much more chilling, from Blofeld in James Bond films to Cruella De Vil in 101 Dalmatians.

The ultimate feline scene stealer has to be the cat stroked by Mafia boss Don Corleone in The Godfather (1972).

WORST: The beloved Hanna-Barbera cartoon Top Cat, which ran from 1961 to 62, was unwisely resurrected with two movie versions, Top Cat (2011) and Top Cat Begins (2015). Both belong at the bottom of a litter tray.

Travolta Comedy BEST: The unintentionally hilarious Battlefield Earth (2000) starring John, a Scientologist, is thought by many the worst film ever made.

Based on a 1982 book by Scientology founder L Ron Hubbard, the action is set in 3000 when humanity rises up against aliens.

WORST: Paired with the late Robin Williams, the star delivered the worst comedy of 2009 with Old Dogs.

Power Tools BEST: Drills, chainsaws and even a woodchipper have been used to inflict serious harm on horror film victims. But the most inventive use of a power tool goes to Braindead (1992), featuring a zombie massacre involving a lawnmower. WORST: Saw 3D, the seventh film in the franchise widely credited with spawning "torture porn", featured two men forced to kill one another with a circular saw or their mutual lover will die.

Paint BEST: Incensed with the cost of having movies classified in the UK, Charlie Lyne made a documentary that showed paint drying for 10 hours. The U certificate would have cost PS4,405.13 from the British Board of Film Classification. WORST: Anthony Hopkins is revered but had an off day in 1996 playing Pablo Picasso in the tedious Surviving Picasso.

Sharks BEST: Steven Spielberg's blockbuster Jaws (1975) made millions afraid to go in the water. But compared to Pixar's Finding Nemo (2003) - and Bruce, the vegetarian shark - the 25ft rubber fish is out of its depth. WORST: Jaws swam on to the screen for a fourth time in 1987 in Jaws: The Revenge, starring Michael Caine.

Entertainment Weekly panned it as one of the worst 25 sequels ever made.

Scary Clown BEST: The spate of creepy clowns terrifying children has been blamed on the 1990 Stephen King mini-series, It. A big screen remake is due next year. WORST: By turning victims into candyfloss, the Killer Klowns From Outer Space (1988) neither amused nor frightened.
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Title Annotation:Editorial; Opinion; Leading articles
Publication:The Mirror (London, England)
Article Type:Editorial
Date:Oct 15, 2016
Words:564
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