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Byline: dear MONDAY

Dear Coleen I'M WORRIED about my dad who has Parkinson's disease. He was living on his own as my mother died a few years ago but recently my 30-year-old brother moved in. I've never really got on with him - we're very different.

I have a good job, a wife and two kids while he's never really found himself and has drifted from one bad relationship to the next.

He's had a succession of poorly paid jobs, which he ends up either leaving or getting fired from.

I've heard from friends that he regularly invites mates over to my dad's house to drink and my dad has told me he stays up late and gets up at lunchtime. It must be like living with a teenager again.

It's good my dad has company but I worry my brother's lifestyle is causing him stress. My dad hasn't said anything but I'm concerned.

Coleen says IF YOUR dad hasn't said anything, then maybe he's OK with it.

Whether your brother is getting up at lunchtime or not, he's there, so will be able to help your dad and deal with any issues.

What's the alternative - your brother moves out so your dad is on his own again? I think until your dad says there's a problem and it's stressing him out, you shouldn't make a big deal of it. Be there for him as much as you can and keep an eye on things. But otherwise stay out of it.

Your brother's lifestyle has nothing to do with how much he loves your dad or his ability to care for him.

He might even feel he's lived in your shadow a bit and this is one way he can be of help, so give him a chance.

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Publication:Daily Record (Glasgow, Scotland)
Date:May 6, 2019
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