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All about forgiveness.

As human beings we tend to do things which may hurt others unknowingly. Most are often hurt by the actions or words of others. Lied to by a friend, gossip spread, cheated by a loved one, criticised for something you worked so hard on.

These wounds can leave a person with lasting feelings of anger, bitterness and sometimes even vengeance. When you're hurt by someone you love and trust, you might become angry, sad or confused.

If you allow negative feelings to crowd out positive feelings, you might find yourself swallowed up by your own bitterness or sense of injustice. That is when forgiveness takes its rightful place. If you're unforgiving, you might pay the price repeatedly by bringing anger and bitterness into every relationship and new experience.

I think that to be able to forgive others, you have to first be able to forgive yourself. By this I mean that if you feel guilty about something, you have to be able to accept that you made a mistake, but you also have to then carry on and move forward. If you cannot forgive yourself, you will constantly berate yourself and you won't be able to leave the past behind.

Forgiveness can be a very subjective and complex process. However one has to remember that it takes a strong person to apologise and an even stronger person to forgive. Forgiving is just not forgetting but also letting go of the hurt.

Imagine a world where forgiveness did not exist... Wouldn't we all be in a sorry state? Obviously it is easy to say everything can be forgiven, but you never know how you will react when you find yourself in that very situation, where you have to decide whether or not you can forgive someone.

Even though I think everything can be forgiven, that doesn't mean that the relationship between the forgiver and the forgiven will go back to the way it was. It is not always possible to trust someone to the same extent as before and even if it is, trust is something which has to be earned back.

To those that have to be forgiven, apologising even for a small reason does not always mean that you are wrong and the other is right, it means that you value your relationship more that your ego. The things people do to each other, they remember. If they renew their friendship, it's not because they forget, its because they forgive. Have a nice day.


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Publication:Gulf Daily News (Manama, Bahrain)
Date:Feb 11, 2012
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