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A guide to Christmas shopping: things to consider when it's time to shop for Christmas.

Things to consider when it's time to shop for Christmas:

Don't buy anyone socks for Christmas.

If I worked behind the counter of a store that played Christmas music over its loudspeakers, I'd want to be paid extra for having to listen to it. There are just so many times anyone can stand to hear "Jingle Bells," "Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer," or even "Silent Night." If you're going to be out shopping for several hours, remember to buy the heavy presents last.

It's difficult to keep ftom buying Christmas presents for other people that you'd like to have for yourself. For instance, I've been thinking of buying a Makita band saw for someone, but I know she'd only take it back and exchange it for a cashmere sweater.

When I was a kid, I always felt sorry for grownups because they got such dull presents. My mother always got slips, usually pink.

Asking salespeople if the item you've selected would fit them or what size they take never helps you get the right size for someone else.

Some people like anything you give them just because you gave it to them. Other people never like anything you give them and there's nothing you can do about it.

It's hard to buy things in some stores. I always give up when I have to deal with more than one salesperson. A lot of places ask you to pick out what you want, go somewhere else to pay for it, and then return to the original place to pick it up. I go somewhere else to shop.

The closer it gets to Christmas, the quicker I make decisions about buying presents.

I spend more money on presents than I used to but people don't seem to like them any better.

It might be worth it for the big stores to go to the trouble of providing coat-check rooms or lockers. When I enter a store from the cold, I'd stay a lot longer and probably buy more if I could get rid of my coat while I'm in there.

You often see ten things you'd like to buy for one person, but nothing seems right for someone else.

Two weeks before Christmas, I always think of a good present for someone but it has to be ordered three weeks in advance.

If you buy several Christmas presents early and have them wrapped or wrap them yourself, it's possible to forget whose present is in which box. You can't always tell what something is by the shape of the box, either.

I get tired a lot faster walking around a big store than I do running around the tennis court.

No matter how many presents you buy, you're always going to be worried you didn't buy enough or the right present for someone.

Bedroom slippers used to be more popular as Christmas presents than they are now. I never wear them myself. On the occasions when I ought to, I go barefoot. Someone always says, "You'll catch cold," but I never have.

Department stores could save a lot of money if they didn't keep their places so hot. Make the clerks wear coats.

I'm surprised perfume is still considered a Christmas gift. It seems old-fashioned. When you can smell perfume, someone's wearing too much.

Stores ought to give customers a choice of wrapping paper. I don't like it to look as though I bought all my presents in one store.

When you're Christmas shopping, it's best not to think of the sales the stores will have after the holidays.

A lot of stores are selling telephones now. I hope no one gives me one. I have no interest in getting a decorator telephone for Christmas. Our two phones are heavy old black ones and they work just fine. I never got over the delight I felt riding an escalator when I was a kid. If I have to go to the eighth floor of a department store today, I still take the escalator even though the elevator's faster.

I'm always surprised how many people in my family give me presents I like when I consider how few things I see that I'd buy for myself.

The Santa Clauses seem a lot seedier than they used to.
COPYRIGHT 1988 Saturday Evening Post Society
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Copyright 1988 Gale, Cengage Learning. All rights reserved.

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Author:Rooney, Andy
Publication:Saturday Evening Post
Date:Dec 1, 1988
Words:713
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