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Byline: Kiki King, Eva Simpson & Caroline Hedley

THERE are more World Cup songs than Russell Brand's got naff chat-up lines - over 30 at last count. With the help of Mirror music critic Gavin Martin, we run down the best... and worst.

1 Sham 69 - Hurry Up England A fine, catchy track from the punk le gends.

Best Line: Now listen here England we're going to win the Cup/You know what you're doing so let's just wrap it up. Rating: ****

2 Stan Boardman - Stan's Song Stan's time has come. It's already at No. 19.

Best Line: Aye aye yippee the Germans bombe d our chippie. Rating: **

3 Ricky - We Are England Blissfully summery. We could dance with joy to this.

Best Line: This is Germany/ where our dream should be and our glor y lies. Rating: ****

4 Joe Fagin - That's England Alright May become the People's anthem.

Best Line: With a little bit of luck/we could win the World Cup. Rating: ***

5 Goleo ft Atomic Kitten - Altogether Now (Stronger Together) Steven Gerrard could be inspired by this one from fellow Scousers The Farm. Oh, and it's by Atomic Kitten.

Best Line: All together now/In no-man's land. Rating: ***

6 Embrace - World At Your Feet Doesn't rate against New Order's World In Motion.

Best Line: With the world at your feet, there's no one you can't beat. Rating: ***

7 Tony Christie - (Is This The Way To) The World Cup In the charts at No. 11, but the fans will come up with better lyrics.

Best Line: England win the World Cup/Michael Owen's always good luck/England win the World Cup/Sven'll dance like old Nobby. Rating: **

8 John Cleese - Don't Mention The World Cup Cleese's flat delivery is Fawlty.

Best Line: Don't call them rude names/It's such a beautiful game/At the glorious moment/When the lions roar/Don't mention the war. Rating: **

9 Christine and Neil Hamilton - England Are Jolly Dee Patronising tosh. Probably the worst record in the world, ever.

Best Line: Football is a game watched by pe ople on their tellies... with nylon shir ts and big beer bellies. Rating: *

10 7 Craz y Frog - We Are The Champions While not condoning violence against frogs, this fella is pushing his luck. Recorded in Germany. Enough said.

Best Line: Ding a dong in the stadium/It's a goal/And we have won. Rating: *
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Title Annotation:Features
Publication:The Mirror (London, England)
Date:Jun 6, 2006
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