Work-family interface for same-sex, dual-earner couples: implications for counselors.

The author highlights information for career counselors to consider when addressing work-family interface with individuals who are members of same-sex, dual-earner couples or families. D. E. Super's (1990) life-span, life-space theory is the framework used to organize the literature review and discussion of current trends. Issues related to the roles of worker, partner, parent, stepparent, and caregiver are discussed. Suggestions are provided for career counselors.

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A significant amount of research has been devoted to the study of work-family interface (for a review, see Perry-Jenkins, Repetti, & Crouter, 2000). The majority of this research has focused on heterosexual dual-earner couples. Although they share some similar experiences with heterosexual, dual-earner couples, same-sex, dual-earner couples encounter additional obstacles and have unique advantages over heterosexual dual-earner couples. The focus of this article is on issues for career counselors to consider when counseling individuals who are members of same-sex, dual-earner couples. Current trends in the workplace are analyzed in relation to counseling with this population, and some potentially useful theoretical approaches and counseling strategies are discussed.

Super's (1990) life-span, life-space theory emphasizes the importance of implementing one's self-concept through a combination of life roles. The work role is addressed in the context of other life roles. Individuals experience varying degrees of participation in, valuing of, and commitment to these roles (Super, 1990). In this article, the roles of worker, partner, parent, stepparent, and caregiver for individuals within same-sex, dual-earner couples are discussed. If career counselors can help these individuals learn to combine work and family roles in productive and satisfying ways, counselors have the opportunity to enhance their quality of life significantly.

The Work Role

In recent years, dramatic workplace changes, such as widespread downsizing and large plant closures, have threatened job security for millions of workers (Crouter & Manke, 1994), and the rate of involuntary job loss has been increasing (Attewell, 1999). Employees who lose their job as a result of downsizing may need to retrain for different jobs, relocate to other geographic locations, or learn to cope with being forced into unemployment. Employees who remain in an organization after major downsizing has occurred often have increased workloads because they must assume responsibility for some of the work that had previously been done by workers who were let go, resulting in job stress and decreased workplace morale. Approximately 30% of displaced workers may be unemployed for a year or more (Attewell, 1999). Longer unemployment can lead to decreased salaries and greater chances of future job displacements (Attewell, 1999) as well as to lower self-esteem.

Career counselors must help individuals define their work role in these uncertain and unpredictable times. Counselors can encourage clients to develop a broad range of transferable skills and to keep skills current through continuing education and training. Counselors can also help clients who have lost their jobs learn to cope with the stress of this event and transition toward new positions. Career counselors are also increasingly called on to help clients make career decisions within the context of their family roles as well as in the context of their other major life roles.

Members of same-sex, dual-earner couples face additional challenges in this volatile work environment. In most cases, insurance covers only the employed individual and not the family members of same-sex couples. Thus, if one partner loses a job, he or she cannot rely on the other partner's insurance benefits. The financial burden of paying for health care compounds the hardship caused by loss of wages. Another economic issue discussed by Fassinger (1995) is that women's earnings remain consistently lower than men's, and lesbian couples are more likely to have children living with them than are gay male couples. Thus, lesbian dual-earner couples may face more economic difficulties than do gay male, dual-earner couples or heterosexual dual-earner couples. Work and relationships are intertwined in many ways. For example, when one partner loses his or her job, the resulting unemployment may cause the family to fall into poverty, which, in turn, can put a tremendous amount of strain on a relationship. Research on heterosexual couples has demonstrated the negative impact of unemployment on marital satisfaction and has linked the resulting poverty and economic stress to separation and divorce (Attewell, 1999; Rank, 2000). Same-sex couples undoubtedly also experience a similar relationship strain when confronted with issues of involuntary unemployment and the resulting poverty.

Discrimination at the workplace is another issue faced by members of same-sex, dual-earner couples. Chung (1995) asserted that career decision making among lesbian, gay, and bisexual individuals can be influenced by expectations regarding acceptance of their sexual identity in the workplace. Pope (1995) suggested that it is important for career counselors to talk openly with clients about types of employment discrimination and relevant laws and employment policies. He also pointed out how helpful it might be for counselors to discuss issues related to coming out in the workplace, such as how to best do this and the potential advantages and disadvantages of self-disclosure. Some individuals may need to remain in the closet at work because of fear of prejudice or discrimination (Prince, 1995). This could lead them to feel isolated and could cut them off from informal social networks that could indirectly benefit their career (Fassinger, 1995). Discrimination and lack of support in the work environment have been linked to depression and psychological distress for lesbian, gay, and bisexual adults (Smith & Ingram, 2004).

Career counselors may help individuals identify work environments where discrimination is less likely to occur. Carrington (1999) interviewed same-sex, dual-earner families and found that participants whose jobs involved providing services primarily to the lesbian and gay community reported greater ease at integrating work and family than did those who provided services to the general public. Members of the latter group were more likely to hide their sexual orientation at work because of fear of discrimination or negative reactions toward them (Carrington, 1999). Counselors may also act as advocates and become involved in activities to fight discrimination in the workplace and society. Feminist theorists assert that the personal is political and that counselors must work to enact systemic social change as well as facilitating individual change (Worrell & Remer, 1992).

Gay and lesbian sexual orientation is frequently not intergenerational, so members of same-sex couples may not have same-sex parental role models, and some may not even have the support of their parents or other family members (Fassinger, 1995). Lack of parental support can negatively affect self-acceptance for lesbian, gay, and bisexual individuals (Mohr & Fassinger, 2003). In light of this, it is crucial for counselors to help individuals in same-sex, dual-earner couples to find role models outside the family and to connect with social support and resources in the community (Pope, 1995). Effective counseling requires counselors to provide a gay and lesbian affirmative environment and to be a source of support to their clients (Dillon & Worthington, 2003). If counselors are unable to provide this affirmative environment, they should refer the client to another counselor and, perhaps, also seek supervision for themselves in order to examine their biases.

Finally, lesbians and gay men may have experienced a delay in career identity development because of focusing on sexual identity development rather than on career development in adolescence and early adulthood, and this delay could lead to foreclosure on a career choice or to career indecision (Fassinger, 1995; Prince, 1995). Thus, members of same-sex couples may seek career counseling to explore and develop their vocational identity. Dunkle (1996) discussed the interplay of lesbian and gay identity development with career development and suggested that career counselors may find Super's (1990) life-span approach to career development to be a useful framework.

The Partner Role

Same-sex, dual-earner couples may have the advantage of more egalitarian relationships than do heterosexual dual-earner couples. For example, Patterson (1995) studied lesbian mothers and found that the division of labor in terms of paid work, domestic tasks, and child care was evenly distributed and that partners tended to perceive relationships as being egalitarian and fair. Perceived relationship equity has been linked to positive relationship outcomes in dual-earner families (Wilkie, Feree, & Ratcliff, 1998).

Other factors that are crucial to couples' relationship quality include effective communication and decision-making strategies. Effective communication is a necessary component in successful relationships (Kincaid & Caldwell, 1995) and can be particularly important for dual-earner couples who are managing several different roles (Perrone & Worthington, 2001). Same-sex, dual-earner couples need to communicate about issues such as "how each acknowledges the other at work, if and how they appear together at work-related social events, and the extent to which their work and personal lives intersect" (Fassinger, 1995, p. 161). If one partner is closeted at work, this can also affect the relationship. Berger (1991) studied the impact of passing as heterosexual on relationships of gay men and lesbians. Findings from this study indicated that, although remaining closeted was not related to love for their partner, participants were more likely to be satisfied with their relationships when employers, families, and friends were aware of their sexual orientation (Berger, 1991).

Counselors can help same-sex, dual-earner couples to make decisions about work-family interface. Zvonkovic, Schmiege, and Hall (1994) studied influence strategies used by couples making work-family decisions. They found that indirect strategies (e.g., emotional influence such as the silent treatment or one partner pouting) were linked to decreased relationship satisfaction, whereas direct strategies (e.g., reward influence, bargaining) did not lead to decreased satisfaction. The authors suggested that counselors train couples to use more direct influence strategies with one another. They also suggested that counselors should encourage each partner to appreciate the efforts of the other partner in both work and family roles (Zvonkovic et al., 1994).

Spiker-Miller and Kees (1995) discussed the need for counselors to help dual-earner couples develop decision-making strategies to use when they are faced with dilemmas such as the need for one partner to relocate geographically or a sick child who needs care when neither partner has flexibility at work to handle unexpected domestic complications. Couples may need help with negotiating expectations of one another and deciding whose career should take precedence in such situations. For example, couples may decide to take turns making career sacrifices for one another, or they might make decisions based on which partner's work provides more financial resources to the family.

It may be useful for counselors to help clients identify role models of other dual-earner couples or families whom they would like to emulate or from whom they could obtain ideas, support, or advice. These role models could include both same-sex couples as well as opposite-sex couples. However, same-sex couples and families might be able to relate more closely to certain experiences and might help address the lack of intergenerational role models for this minority group.

The Parent Role

Although women in same-sex couples are more likely than men in same-sex couples to have children living in the home (Fassinger, 1995), there is evidence that the parent role is no less important to men than to women. Barnett, Brennan, and Marshall (1994) surveyed men and women from dual-earner couples regarding the quality of their relationships with their children and how this affected parents' psychological distress. They found that both mothers and fathers felt psychological distress if they did not have high-quality relationships with their children. There were no gender differences in this effect (Barnett et al., 1994).

Same-sex couples with children may experience challenges in terms of social connectedness. Carrington (1999) asserted that some childless same-sex couples, especially gay men, tend to have "a fairly strong sentiment against children" (p. 133) and may "intentionally diminish relationships with friends who have children" (p. 133). Thus, same-sex couples with children may feel alienated from friendships with same-sex couples who do not have children. Gay and lesbian parents may also encounter barriers in forming bonds with heterosexual parents because of the differences in their lifestyles (Carrington, 1999). Social relationships are important sources of support for parents, and counselors may need to help clients explore ways to develop networks with other parents with whom they can relate.

The Stepparent Role

Although there are many different types of gay and lesbian families, the most prevalent type is lesbian stepfamilies (Erera, 2002). The nonbiological parent in a same-sex couple may have no legal rights regarding the children and is not guaranteed custody if something should happen to the biological parent (Savin-Williams & Esterberg, 2000). The fact that the nonbiological parent has no legal claim to the children can affect relationships and may diminish the role of the nonbiological parent in the family.

Many same-sex, dual-earner couples face concerns related to blending two (or more) families together (Hetherington & Stanley-Hagan, 2000). Custody of children may be shared between two families, requiring children to negotiate their place within each family system. The parenting role of the stepparent is not always clearly defined, and communication between partners regarding expectations and boundaries is necessary. New same-sex, dual-earner couples are in a position where they need to define both their role as a partner and their role as a parent simultaneously, in addition to meeting the demands of two careers (Hetherington & Stanley-Hagan, 2000). Counseling may be beneficial, particularly in the initial phases of the relationship. A systems approach that includes all members of the newly formed family unit might be most effective when addressing the areas that Berger (1998) identified for counselors to focus on when working with stepfamilies: establishing boundaries; clarifying roles; developing skills of communication, negotiation, and conflict resolution; and building parental coalitions between the custodial parent and stepparent and between the noncustodial parent and stepparent.

The Caregiver Role

In addition to caring for children, many individuals are also caring for older adult family members such as aging parents. Because individuals are living longer, there is a greater likelihood that family members will need to care for older members of the family. The term sandwich generation has been used to describe families who are concurrently caring for both children and parents (Hansen, 1997). Furthermore, some individuals may find themselves in a caregiving role with their partner, for example, when one partner has a chronic illness. The healthy partner must often balance his or her role as a caregiver partner with the roles of career person and parent. The caregiver role makes additional demands on time and energy and can contribute to role strain (Gordon & Perrone, 2004). Whether caring for children, aging family members, or a partner, couples need to negotiate how to share family responsibilities in a mutually satisfying way.

Theoretical Approaches

Two potentially useful theoretical career counseling approaches that may be used for same-sex, dual-earner couples are Hansen's (1997, 2001) Integrative Life Planning (ILP) approach and Cook, Heppner, and O'Brien's (2002) ecological career counseling perspective.

Hansen's ILP (1997, 2001) approach focuses on planning for all life roles and understanding their interrelationships. Hansen suggested that counselors emphasize role flexibility, spirituality, equal partnerships in relationships, adaptability to frequent changes, and the valuing of relationships as well as achievement. Furthermore, she calls on counselors to be advocates and change agents for their clients (Hansen, 2001).

Cook et al. (2002) articulated an ecological career counseling approach. The ecological perspective views the individual within the context of various systems. In addition to helping the client work toward career goals, counselors using this approach would also serve as client advocates to enact social changes in the workplace as well as to encourage clients to change their environments. Cook and colleagues suggested strategies for managing work and family roles, including changing the structure of the workplace, helping clients negotiate with employers to meet their work and family needs, and helping clients negotiate with partners regarding sharing family responsibilities.

Counseling Strategies

Several authors (e.g., Spiker-Miller & Kees, 1995; Stolze-Loike, 1992) have discussed the value of conjoint career counseling for heterosexual dual-earner couples. Same-sex couples may also find this approach helpful. In conjoint career counseling, counselors work with both the identified client and the client's partner. The career development of both the client and the partner is addressed, as well as the mutual impact on both partners of work and family concerns. Factors such as each partner's goals, values, age, career stage, and commitment to work and family are assessed. For same-sex couples, stage of sexual identity development could also be discussed, as could degree of openness about sexual identity with family, friends, coworkers, and employers. Conjoint career counseling addresses career, relationship, and child-rearing concerns and is comprehensive. Spiker-Miller and Kees (1995) stated that individuals' careers are not isolated from other aspects of their lives and argued that integrating career, personal, and family counseling is the most helpful approach.

Tailoring treatment to the needs of dual-career couples was discussed by Sperry (1993). He recommended individual counseling for situations in which one partner was struggling with some issues, conjoint counseling for situations in which relationship dynamics were affected, and couples groups for situations in which relationship conflict was relatively low or in which the couple required support in dealing with primarily external stressors. A group for same-sex, dual-earner couples would also be valuable in providing support and a sense of community.

Conclusion

The challenges faced by counselors of dual-earner families, in general, and same-sex, dual-earner families, specifically, are multiple and complex. Counselors must start by assessing the specific needs of each client and then designing treatment strategies to meet those needs. Career counselors are encouraged to use creative and varied approaches to counseling, rather than being constrained by traditional definitions of career counseling. Viewing each client as a whole person within the context of various life roles rather than narrowly focusing on the career role is recommended.

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Kristin M. Perrone, Department of Counseling Psychology, Ball State University. Correspondence concerning this article should be addressed to Kristin M. Perrone, Department of Counseling Psychology, Ball State University, Muncie, IN 47306 (e-mail: [e-mail]).