Why I became, and am becoming, a Catholic.

Flannery O'Connor once said, "You don't join the Catholic Church, you become a Catholic!" My journey into the Roman Catholic church from evangelical Anglicanism certainly resonates with O'Connor's statement.

Not too long ago I was in an Episcopal seminary in the United States on my way to ordination as an Episcopal priest. Halfway through my seminary education, I decided, "This isn't for me!" I was too much of an academic, and I was becoming far too frustrated with the politics of the Episcopal Church and Anglican Communion in general.

When my wife and I first came to Canada to start our graduate work, we kept attending an Anglican church. We were part of an Episcopal-Evangelical movement in the United States, and we wanted to continue within that movement in Canada. After about six months of worshipping in a local Anglican-Evangelical church in Toronto, we decided that we no longer fitted into the mould of the Anglican church. Its issues and its fights were not ours.

It was simply depressing to go to worship service after worship service and hear over and over again about 'same-sex issues' in the Anglican Communion, and, questions like, "What are we going to do if Canterbury approves this or the Africans respond with that?" The fallout of such discussions was always painful, and people on both sides of the 'same-sex debate' always ended up hurt and in despair. Furthermore, it seemed as if the Eucharist became a secondary consideration to talks about same-sex issues. So, Kari and I decided to set some limits. We basically decided that if the Episcopal Church in the United States once again tabled discussions about 'same-sex marriage' over the next few years and if the General Convention of the Anglican Church of Canada did the same thing, then we were done with Anglicanism. But, here is where things get interesting!

It seems like the automated response of Anglicans who knew me assumed that my reason for leaving Anglicanism had solely to do with my stance on the same-sex issue. To an extent, that is true, but, as with most things in my life, the same-sex debate was only a small part of a much larger issue for me. I actually decided to leave the Anglican Communion for Catholicism for two basic reasons: 1) because of power politics and 2) because of pacifism and social justice, which I did not feel I could adequately express in a Eucharistic context within Anglicanism. Let me explain.

When the Episcopal Church met and consecrated Gene Robinson, a practising homosexual, as a bishop, I was upset. But, unlike many Episcopalians it was not just Robinson's consecration that angered me. In fact, something else upset me far more than Robinson.

The night before there was to be a vote on Robinson's consecration, a talk was to be given by an African priest on the struggles of the Anglican church in Africa. The talk was to focus on issues like HIV/AIDS, Muslim persecution of Christians, the genocide in the Sudan, and every other topic associated these days with Africa. Instead of going to hear the plight of African Christians, the Episcopal News Service reported that those who opposed Robinson's consecration held a worship service to pray against Robinson's consecration while those who supported Robinson also held a prayer service to pray for Robinson's consecration. I could not believe it! For me, that was it! That was the last straw! On either side, the behaviour amounted to simple power politics and a type of individualism that I decided I could no longer handle.

On the one hand, I was surprised to learn that the so-called 'liberals' of the church, who often support the poor and the oppressed, and who practise social justice regularly, also walked away from Africa. And, in my lesser moments, I thought, "What hypocrisy!" On the other hand, I could not understand why the so-called 'conservatives' of the church thought the consecration of a homosexual bishop outweighed supporting persecuted Christians in Africa. None of it made any sense to me!

What I did not understand at the time--and I still do not--was why these so-called 'conservative' Christians were bogged down with opposing a practising 'gay' bishop instead of focusing on doing the work of the Kingdom. Surely persecuted Christians in Africa matter more, but I soon found out that this sentiment of mine was not shared by many in the Episcopal Church who opposed 'same-sex marriage' in the church as I do.

Upon learning of the events at General Convention, I wrote the President of the American Anglican Council, a conservative, reform movement in the Episcopal church, a movement that I certainly sympathize with in thought and creed. To make a long story short, the AAC informed me that, "Yes, poverty, HIV/AIDS, persecuted Christians, unjust wages for church workers, etc. were important, biblical issues, but that same-sex marriage overshadowed all of these." What I took away from this was that most conservatives and evangelicals in the Episcopal church were going to have nothing to do with HIV/AIDS, persecution, torture, and Africa, but with the long and labourious discussions about sex! Wonderful!

I am an American. I have often been told by Canadians that I am more Canadian than American, and this is largely due to my politics, which tend to be rather socialist in theory and practice. However, cliched as it may sound, September 11, 2001 changed everything for me, as it did for most of the world. After 9/11, as it has come to be called, I realized that I needed to make some quick and important decisions. I had always assumed that war was counter to the message of Jesus Christ and that the church should stand up to the idea of war and offer a third alternative. However, I never thought I needed to make this a major focus of my academic work and practical as well as spiritual thinking. 9/11 changed all of that!

One of the things that impressed me most about Pope John Paul II was that he was willing to confront world leaders. Most Americans tend to forget that John Paul II confronted Reagan, Bush Senior, Clinton, and current president, George W. Bush, on the excessiveness of capitalism and on foreign policy issues. Even social Democrats, such as myself, often forget that John Paul II confronted Clinton after he approved the invasion of Somalia. After 9/11 I began to watch Pope John Paul II carefully. I have to admit, I was impressed! While a large majority of American Christians, including many that I knew in the Episcopal church, where calling for justice and retaliation against the Taliban, I saw in Pope John Paul II a response to this mess that came right from the heart of Jesus.

Here was a man commanding his Church to come up with an alternative way of fighting terrorism instead of immediately sending in tanks, planes, and guns. What he was saying totally contradicted what I was hearing in many American churches, where Episcopal priests and Protestant pastors were acting as if America had some kind of mandate from God to eradicate so-called 'evil' in this world, presumably, by supporting the Bush administration in the war on terror. To watch a frail, 80-something-year-old man stand for something different than the American solution and to confront the Western powers-that-be made a huge impact on me and my faith.

As I have become a part of the Catholic Church, none of this has changed. One thing that has changed, however, is my sacramental life. One of the most important things to me these days is participating as a member of a non-violent community in the Eucharist. As I partake of the Body and Blood of Our Lord, I always think how this new family of mine is an alternative community within a much greater society. I always think about how this community lives in this world but does not belong to it. And, without a doubt, I think about how this community, through Jesus Christ, has the ability to eradicate poverty, end violence, and provide alternatives to Western powers with regard to their foreign policy issues. I always think about how this meal, this Eucharist, is a better way than the way of so many politicians from my own country and many other countries throughout the world.

It has been close to a year since I have entered the Catholic Church. During that time I have joined up with the lay-Jesuits, or, Christian Life Community. I have become active in our parish, Our Lady of Lourdes, and I have begun to notice something: I did not enter the Catholic Church. No, I have become a Catholic!

David Reed is finishing his Ph.D. studies in New Testament at the Toronto School of Theology, and is a full-time instructor in the Department of Religion at Wright State University in Dayton, Ohio.