Who is calling who a moron? The million-dollar question is who really is the moron?

I note with only limited pleasure that the communications director of the Prime Minister's Office, Francoise Ducros, was caught in the act of being herself the other day in Europe, which is to say, being mouthy and arrogant. She called the president of the United States a moron.

I have nothing against being mouthy and arrogant, (I have certainly been worse on occasion) but I am offended when one is being mouthy arrogant and STUPID.

The problem is this. Strictly speaking, George Bush is probably not a moron.

A moron, among other things is an adult who has the maturity and intelligence of an eight-year-old child.

God knows, you have to stop and think about it, but no, he probably is not.

On the other hand we need to consider the question in its totality.

These are not easy times for us with our friends to the south, and we have an unhealthy overwhelming dependence on their good will, or at least their lack of bad will.

For a Canadian in the PMO's office to reference to the president of the United States in these thoughtful terms is not unlike a very thin eight-year-old kid without medical health insurance mentioning to his pet dog in a secluded and otherwise empty schoolyard that Billy, who is 212 pounds and standing right next to him is a moron. Your only hope is Billy does not know what it means.

Let us assume for a minute that Billy is not just standing next to the 12-year-old boy in the secluded, but otherwise empty school yard, but rather has already put his foot on top of the little guys head at about 35 miles per hour because Billy does not like the skinny little runt anyway (say the moral equivalent of the softwood lumber duties) and the question immediately arises as to whom is the moron.

Admittedly, it is hard to be dispassionate when someone has their foot on your head, but a prudent student would keep his opinions to himself until out of earshot or, failing that, in possession of pepper spray to cover the retreat.

In fairness, the skinny little runt did not actually say anything to Billy's face; she said it to what is known as a journalist. Actually she said it to a journalist, but it was another journalist who overheard the remark who ran to Billy and told him all about it. The courageous journalist was apparently unhappy with the skinny little runt for other misdemeanors and felt it was fair ball to report a private conversation, not meant for his ears, but carelessly taking place near his ears.

Makes you wonder about journalists who think they are so important they can take private conversations and-make them public without regard to the collateral damage they may cause others, even when the point involved is of absolutely no importance.

Makes you wonder how truly obnoxious one must be to earn such disregard. Of course it does not stop there.

Because there are skinny little opposition runts who feel the need to express their sycophantic views about Billy on Billy's television networks, before you know it a tiny private stupid remark made by one pipsqueak and overheard by another becomes news for a day. Although Billy says it is no big deal, you know for sure when it comes time to ask Billy to take his foot off of the skinny little runt's head Billy will not have forgotten.

If you need reminding, the last time there was an errant microphone near the president who was talking to his vice- president during the 2000 election campaign he was talking about a son of a bitch reporter for the New York Times newspaper, a term he likely would not have used if he had known it would be on national television.

The game show question for a million dollars is: who is the moron?

a) The mouthy arrogant pipsqueak

b) The immoral tattler pipsqueak

c) The employer of the arrogant pipsqueak

d) Billy, for being Billy

e) All of the above

Michael Atkins is the president of Northern Ontario Business.