Where's the beef?

You come home. You're hungry. You're tired. You want something that's quick, healthy, and--oh, yeah--delicious for dinner.

How about a veggieburger?

Don't laugh. Non-meat burgers have come a long way from the days when they looked--and tasted--like canned dog food.

Trust us. If they didn't please enough palates, places like Planet Hollywood, T.G.I. Friday's, and Chili's wouldn't carry them.

And you want simple? Try this: Pull one out of the freezer and saute it in a smidgen of oil or pop it into the toaster oven. Meanwhile, slice open a crusty whole wheat roll or toasted pita bread and spread on some ketchup or spicy mustard. Add sliced onion, ripe tomato, and romaine lettuce and that's it.

You're talking ten minutes from open package to open mouth.

VEGGIE HEAVEN

Granted, even the best veggieburger may not satisfy the tastebuds of a dyed-in-the-wool beef lover. But think of all the things you'll be missing by passing up the ground beef: E. coli, Salmonella, and fat, for a start.

Six of the 17 grams of fat in three ounces of cooked "regular" ground beef are the artery-clogging saturated kind. Even ground beef that's ten percent fat (by weight) has 11 grams of fat per burger (see "Flipping Burgers"). What's more, beef has no fiber, no phytochemicals to cut the risk of cancer, and, frankly, no variety.

Nowadays, there are so many kinds of veggieburgers that you can have a different one every day of the week. Of course, some are healthier--and tastier--than others.

WANNA-BEEFS

Veggieburgers vary. Some, like Boca Burgers, try to taste like meat. They're made mostly of soy protein, and when it comes to flavor, they're not far off the mark. (Hey. Even fast-food-fan Bill Clinton loves Bocas.)

You might be disappointed if you're hoping for a thick, juicy burger, but if your standard is McDonald's, you probably won't notice much of a difference.

Unlike the beef wannabes, some brands don't seem the least bit interested in matching meat's flavor. Gardenburgers, for example, are proud of their mushroom-brownrice-onion-and-chee se makings. (So is T.G.I. Friday's, as well as the participating Subways, Planet Hollywoods, IHOPs, and Applebee's that sell them.)

Ditto for Morningstar Farms' Spicy Black Bean Burgers (sold at participating Chili's) and its Garden Vege Patties. Shape is their only resemblance to hamburgers.

Unless it's fortified (like Green Giant Harvest Burgers), no veggieburger can match beef's protein, iron, zinc, and vitamin B-12. But some--especially those made with soy--are still a good source of protein and iron.

What's more, most people aren't in danger of running short of the nutrients in beef. They're more likely to need the fiber and phytochemicals in veggieburgers.

What they don't need is the sodium. Our Best Bites limit salt. But watch out: Our criteria apply to a single burger.

Some patties have nearly twice the calories of others. If you eat two smallish Boca Burgers, for example, you'll end up with more sodium than if you had eaten one of the larger burgers like Green Giant's Harvest Burgers (which had too much sodium for a Best Bite).

Green Giant's popular burgers have another problem. The label lists 1.5 grams of saturated fat, but that doesn't include the additional 1.8 grams of bans fat they get from the added hydrogenated oil. (How do we know? We sent six samples--purchased in three cities--to a lab for analysis.) With more than three grams of artery-clogging fat per serving, Harvest Burgers don't even deserve an Honorable Mention.

BEST-TASTING BITES

Here are the best-tasting Best Bites and a few of the best-selling Honorable Mentions. None of the grain or tempeh (cultured soybean) burgers made our taste cutoff.

VEGETABLE

* Gardenburger. The best of the bunch. That includes the original, Veggie Medley, and Zesty Bean varieties.

* Morningstar Farms or Natural Touch Garden Vege Patties. Mushrooms, water chestnuts, carrots, onions, and textured vegetable protein give them the taste of Veggie Medley Gardenburgers.

* Morningstar Farms Garden Grain Patties. Like original Gardenburgers, but not as tasty. Mushrooms dominate the flavor.

* Fantastic Foods Nature's Burger. The Roasted Red Pepper and Garlic flavor was slightly tastier than the Southwestern Black Bean or the Original Grilled.

SOY (MEAT-FLAVORED)

* Boca Burgers. Best of the wanna-beef bunch. If you tire of the Vegan Original, try Chef Max's Favorite or Hint of Fresh Garlic.

* Morningstar Farms Prime Patties. Nice meat-like taste, but a touch drier than Boca Burgers.

RELATED ARTICLE: FLIPPING BURGERS

"Best Bites" have no more than four grams of total fat, 1.5 grams of artery-clogging (saturated plus bans) fat, and 300 milligrams of sodium per patty. "Honorable Mentions" can have up to 400 mg of sodium. The weight (in ounces) of each patty is in parentheses following its name. Burgers are ranked from least to most fat, then least to most sodium. Ground beef in italics is listed for comparison.

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