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VAL (right) has her day in court - a gutsy performance that makes the girls of Chicago look like mere amateurs.
But can she convince the court that her crimes were motivated not by greed, but despair?
Certainly dropping the name of her business partner "Mr Councillor Eric Pollard" is an act of pure desperation.
"You likely know him," she reassures the magistrate. "I shouldn't wonder if you're not in the same secret society."
At this rate, the thieving Geordie could be dancing the cell-block tango by teatime.
And, after being ditched by Rodney, Lesley now has Ivan the hunky binman collapsed on her sofa.
He may have a stomach bug, but this still makes him a far more attractive proposition than Rodders.
Lesley would do well to pounce before the lad regains his strength.