WHAT'S THE FREQUENCY : AUDIENCE NOT TAKEN FOR GRANT-ED; REFRESHINGLY AUTHORITATIVE, YET NICE STYLE DISTINGUISHES RADIO'S PREMIER PSYCHOLOGIST.

Byline: Fred Shuster

After enduring other radio love doctors who seem to take perverse pleasure in belittling listeners, KRLA's Dr. Toni Grant is a refreshing change of pace.

Grant's medicine goes down easily. She doesn't torment callers or enjoy antagonizing the poor anonymous souls who have nowhere else to turn for common-sense advice.

Billed as ``the doctor who tells it like it is but in a nice way,'' Grant has a pleasant give and take with her listeners, and while she does by necessity place herself above the fray, she doesn't verbally abuse anyone.

Ultimately, Grant preaches the sturdy advice found in her best seller, ``Being a Woman.'' Her mantra targets marriage above all. But the well-spoken Grant, back on the air locally after taking a seven-year hiatus to ``live the book I wrote,'' rarely serves up moldy platitudes.

While her advice to women is based on good old horse sense, she administers it with refreshing authority.

Living in sin? Uh-uh, not unless you have a firm commitment, engagement ring and wedding date, she advises.

Dating like a lunatic? You're wasting your time and affection. Find someone with husband potential - fast. You're not getting any younger, sweetheart.

And never go into a relationship thinking you can change your mate. Acceptance is the key. And let him know you appreciate him, really appreciate him.

``A man needs to know that you love and adore him and that he is your hero,'' Grant says again and again.

Grant urges women to separate the men from the boys. A real honest-to-goodness man, she says, will naturally want to protect, marry and take care of his lady. A boy - well, they're only in it for kicks.

Often, Grant moves from the bedroom and boardroom to the kids' room, where she appears to be pretty solid on child-rearing. Even as she insists that spanking is OK until about age 6, Grant admits she's taken an unpopular position.

``I am a spanking advocate,'' she declared the other day. ``And it's dangerous to be a spanking advocate these days.''

Grant was characteristically clear in articulating why she believes in physical punishment. The example she gave was continued back-talk from a child. After all else fails and the child continues to act smart, a parent is fully within his or her rights to give the kid a swat, Grant said.

Additionally, Grant urges parents to avoid the trap of attempting to be merely a friend to their child. While it's fine to be a pal, the youngster should know that the parent's word carries weight, Grant says.

``You are the parent, you are the authority figure,'' Grant said. ``What you say should mean something.''

If Grant's manifesto has a weakness, it's in giving all sorts of behavior the overused addiction tag. Someone who shops a lot or indulges in ice cream often or has a soft spot for action movies invariably is going to get labeled an addict on Grant's program.

But she's also quick to point out when a caller apparently doesn't need much more than a few words of advice from her to solve a problem. She often says most people don't need psychotherapy, that the majority of adults can navigate life's trials and tribulations just fine.

During a memorable call last week, a father told Grant he was having problems with his adult son, who lived with him while holding down a steady job.

``He's a pretty good kid above all, and you're a pretty good dad,'' Grant said after hearing the father's relatively minor complaints. ``He'll move out when he's good and ready. He's not ready yet, but he will be. You have nothing to worry about.''

That was refreshing coming from a radio psychologist. Grant's competitors should say it more often.

NEXT UP: KIEV-AM's George Putnam.

THE FACTS

The show: ``Dr. Toni Grant.''

Where: KRLA-AM (1110).

When: Noon to 3 p.m. weekdays.

Description: Grant provides both clinical and common-sense solutions to callers' problems in love and life, from bedroom to boardroom.

Sample: ``Life is not a dress rehearsal.''

Etiquette: Pleasant, polite and non-confrontational with callers; nice radio voice.

Bio: A clinical psychologist and pioneer in media psychology, Grant began the nation's first psychology call-in radio show in 1975. In 1986, she was recruited by the Mutual Broadcasting System and syndicated to 180 markets, including KFI-AM (640), until she departed from the airwaves in 1990. Grant's 1988 book, ``Being a Woman,'' which urged women to reclaim their femininity and return to more traditional moral and family values, was a best seller. In spring 1997, she returned to broadcasting, syndicating her three-hour daily show from Dallas. She has two adult daughters.

Ratings: Grant's KRLA time slot puts her up against advice rival and ratings powerhouse Dr. Laura Schlessinger on KFI-AM (640). Grant maintains a small but improving share of the local radio audience.

Who's listening: Mostly adult females, ages 25 to 64. Some 35 percent of Grant's audience consists of males of the same age group.

Parental warning: Kids 13 and older should be OK.

Our rating: Three stars.

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Photo

Photo: On the air noon to 3 p.m. weekdays on KRLA-AM (1110), Dr. Toni Grant returned to local radio after taking a seven-year hiatus to ``live the book I wrote.''