WAYANS IS THE ONLY THING FUNNY IN HIS NEW SITCOM.

Byline: David Kronke TV Critic

Damon Wayans is pretty funny in his new situation comedy, but virtually nothing else is. Everything, up to and including the title, ``My Wife and Kids,'' is strictly generic, synthetic, regulation sitcom issue, even the family's teensy backyard set: We see Wayans mowing the same patch of Astroturf repeatedly because, frankly, there's nothing else there. It's sort of a metaphor for the series in general.

Wayans stars as Michael Kyle, a successful small businessman who owns a trucking service and trucks in the American Dream: His wife, Janet (Tisha Campbell-Martin), is his high-school sweetheart, and he has three lively, mouthy progeny, Junior (George O. Gore II), Claire (Jazz Raycole) and Kady (Parker McKenna Posey). (Had the producers been able to figure out how to do it, I'm certain they would have given Michael and Janet precisely 2.5 kids.)

Michael's life is complicated with the usual sitcom problems and resolved with the usual sitcom solutions. Problem: Old-fashioned Michael doesn't think his wife should work. Solution: Michael gets an (offscreen) attitude adjustment. Problem: The extents to which Claire will go to be popular with friends and boys startles Michael. Solution: Michael tells Claire it's important to be true to herself. Problem: Junior's lazy when it comes to everything from chores to basketball. Solution: Michael shows Junior how important it is to work hard and develop his basketball skills.

Problem: Michael feels old and creaky (Wayans, no Robert De Niro, is way too buff to sell this premise, and a cheap gag which finds him decked out in a dorky, tight old basketball uniform doesn't work because it's clear he's cool enough to realize how deeply uncool that outfit truly is.) Solution: Michael works out and develops his own basketball skills.

And so on: ``My Wife and Kids'' is ``Oprah'' in sitcom form.

Wayans is predictably entertaining, whether riffing on basketball stars or rappers or women (he dismisses couple's therapy as ``an opportunity for women to do the things they love most - talk and spend money''). But it's apparent he's simply a stand-up comic bouncing his punch lines off other actors: He addresses his kids like they're ventriloquist's dummies, and he could deliver their lines more humorously than they do. Wayans and co-creator Don Reo should take a look at, say, ``Everybody Loves Raymond,'' and see how much richer the comedy is when everyone gets funny lines.

It's fairly admirable that someone of Wayans' skills even wants to try his hand at a comedy the whole family can watch, since there are precious few of them available these days. But ``My Wife and Kids'' scarcely attempts to creatively reimagine the family sitcom. Wayans should take a lesson from his TV son Junior and work harder at his comedy.

``MY WIFE AND KIDS''

What: Damon Wayans stars in the new millennium's answer to ``Father Knows Best.''

The stars: Damon Wayans, Tisha Campbell-Martin, George O. Gore II, Jazz Raycole.

Where: ABC (Channel 7).

When: 8 p.m. Wednesdays.

Our rating: Two and one half stars

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Damon Wayans ponders his place in the American Dream in the new sitcom ``My Wife and Kids,'' at 8 tonight on ABC.