WAR FOES DRIVEN BY LOSSES SOME RELATIVES OF SLAIN SOLDIERS BECOME ACTIVISTS.

Byline: Angie Valencia-Martinez Staff Writer

While serving a second tour of duty in Iraq, Navy medic John Daniel House questioned U.S. strategy in the Middle East.

The 28-year-old sailor confided in those close to him that upon his return to American soil, he would speak publicly against what he considered an unjust war.

In January, the Johnny Cash-worshipping rockabilly fan from Simi Valley was killed in a helicopter crash on the Iraq-Syrian border along with 30 Marines.

Now, war widow Melanie House, 27, says it is up to her to give the fallen medical corpsman a voice.

``John was against the war. He used to say, 'I don't know why I'm here or why my friends are dying in my arms,''' she said.

``I support our troops. I love my country. But I won't rest until John is heard. This is my mission. I want the American people to see that when they say 1,800 servicemen have died, it's not just a number. It's 1,800 families that will never be the same.''

As the number of U.S. casualties rises, some spouses and parents are taking firm stands against the Iraq war.

Cindy Sheehan, who lost her son Army Spc. Casey Sheehan in Iraq last year, became an icon of the anti-war movement in a matter of days after setting up a vigil near President George W. Bush's ranch in Crawford, Texas, in August. She was hoping to question him about the war and get answers as to why her son died.

Jane Bright, the West Hills mother of fallen soldier Army Sgt. Evan Ashcraft, said she never supported going to war. There were no weapons of mass destruction and no link between Iraq and al-Qaida, she said.

Ashcraft, a 24-year-old aspiring Los Angeles Police Department officer from the San Fernando Valley, was killed in 2003 when his convoy came under enemy fire. He also left a young widow behind.

Burying her son fueled her desire to speak out. She joined thousands of war protesters last weekend at ``Camp Casey'' outside the president's ranch. Bright said she also is looking for answers.

``We want to know why we're still there,'' said the West Hills resident. ``The whole anti-war movement by the parents who lost children has been based on love.

``Americans continue to die and this needs to stop. To me, it's clear that we shouldn't be in Iraq. It's not about politics. It's about showing support for our soldiers and bringing them home to their families where they belong.''

Still, not all parents of slain servicemen and women feel the same.

``I happen to think we're there for the right reasons,'' said Tony DiRaimondo, whose son Michael A. DiRaimondo was killed in action in January 2004.

``I completely respect views on the other side. I don't agree with them, but I respect them. They have the absolute right to protest ... That is a fundamental freedom that our military defends,'' added DiRaimondo, who was in the Army during the Vietnam era.

Michael A. DiRaimondo, 22, was an Army flight medic whose job was to treat wounded soldiers and transport them to hospitals. Tony DiRaimondo said his son believed in what he was doing.

Some defenders of the war say slain soldiers' grieving relatives who go on to protest the war are exploiting their deaths to promote a personal agenda.

San Francisco radio talk-show host Melanie Morgan, who's group Move Forward America organized the ``You Don't Speak For Me, Cindy'' tour, said the feelings of anti-war demonstrators do not represent the rest of the country.

``We feel that the majority of military families support the president, support the war and the mission,'' she said. ``The service members believed they were fighting a noble cause, and we do too.''

But the wives and mothers of some slain soldiers say they feel compelled to speak out.

Melanie House, the young widow and mother of James Cash House, now 8 months old, has joined a group of demonstrators in Boise, Idaho, met with grieving mother Cindy Sheehan outside the president's Texas ranch, and has arranged candlelight vigils in Simi Valley.

Next week, she is due to appear in a nationwide television commercial speaking out against the war.

Several liberal advocacy groups have contacted her to share her story. In memory of her husband, she will continue to spread the message, she said.

``My son will never meet his father and I'm a widow at 27,'' said Melanie House. ``How does that happen and for what? I was supposed to grow old with him, have another baby with him. This is not what I'm supposed to be doing. This is the last thing I'd imagined for myself.''

Angie Valencia-Martinez, [phone]

angie.valencia(at)dailynews.com

CAPTION(S):

2 photos

Photo:

(1 -- color in Simi edition -- ran in Valley and Simi editions) Melanie House, widow of slain Navy medic John Daniel House, has gotten involved in the anti-war movement.

(2 -- ran in Valley and Simi editions) John Daniel and Melanie House had an infant son together. John House was killed in a helicopter crash in Iraq.

Michael Owen Baker/Staff Photographer