Unwanted sister.

My brother just got out of jail for doing and selling drugs. Now I feel all weird around him. We used to get along, but now he's different. I still love him, but he doesn't act like he loves me.

Dear Unwanted Sister,

I'm sorry you feel shunned by your brother. It's possible he's angry at himself or ashamed for disappointing you by making bad choices and falling off the big-brother pedestal. Take advantage of family holiday traditions to get your relationship back on track. It may never again feel like the bond you had when you were little, but you can still be close. Do you decorate the house or buy a tree? Let this year be the same. Also, leave a handmade holiday card on his pillow that says, "I'm glad you're home, and I want you to know I'll always love you." Can you talk to a parent about this? I applaud you for making smart choices yourself.

Carol Weston's books include Girltalk: All the Stuff Your Sister Never Told You and For Girls Only (HarperCollins) as well as The Diary of Melanie Martin and three other novels (Knopf). Her website is carolweston.com. You can also write Carol c/o Girls' Life, 4517 Harford Road, Baltimore, MD 21214. For a reply, include a stamped self-addressed envelope. Carol is sorry that she can't answer every question personally, but you can find her online at girlslife.com.