Trick tip: that flip trick the old dude at the skatepark keeps trying on the bank.

YOU KNOW THE TRICK I'm talking about, right? That trick that the old dude with the kneepads keeps trying? How did that dude even get on the street course? I thought that dude lived in the bowl. I guess it doesn't matter how he got onto the street course. The real question is, what the hell is that flip trick he's trying and how do you do it? Here's the deal:

1. MOST IMPORTANTLY, if you actually skate street then you're never going to be able to properly do this trick. A complete nonexistent grasp of board control and pop is going to be required. That's essential.

2. THAT BEING SAID, you're going to have at least landed one or two flip tricks in your life to make you think that you're actually capable of landing a trick on the bank ramp. Maybe like, a kickflip in a parking lot in the early '90s when finding good transition was like finding that little Elmo doll on Christmas Eve 1996.

3. OK, SO YOU'VE LANDED at least one or two flip tricks in a parking lot. Next step. Skate nothing but howls and shit like that for a good five or six years. Don't even ollie up a curb during that time. Don't even do an ollie in the howl. Just slash that shit for awhile.

4. WHAT'S NEXT? Well I guess when you're skating from the bowl at the skatepark out to the parking lot to drink beer, check out that bank ramp. And then remember that flip trick you landed that one time. You're getting the idea, right?

5. NOW SKATE OVER to that bank ramp. Make sure you kind of carve some shit on the way there to let all the kids know you've got some style. Now get your old ass up that bank ramp.

6. WHEN YOU GET AS HIGH on that bank ramp as you're going to get, do a real jerky combination between a varial kickflip and a front foot impossible. Try to shoot your board at least three to four feet away from you.

7. OH YEAH, you're going to want to do this thing backside. Don't try to act like you have any idea how to do any type of frontside flip shit. That's just going to look even sadder.

8. SO AFTER YOU DO THAT spastic kickout type of thing, land with both of your feet together on the bank ramp and shout some sort of obscenity. Let everybody know that you really thought you were going to land that Hail Mary.

9. SHIT, I GUESS from there you just repeat steps 5-8 until you get bored. I wouldn't do it any longer than 15 minutes or so though. Otherwise there probably won't be any cold beer left out in the parking lot when you get out there.

10. SO WHEN YOU'RE SICK of trying that flip trick then head outside and roll over to the pickup truck with the tailgate down. When all of your bowl friends ask where you've been, just say some shit like, "You know, just skating the street course a little ... "Then remind them of that three-flat-three double set you ollied in 1994. You know the one. Sick.