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Through a joke, darkly: Augusten Burroughs is the gay humorist of the season, as he has come back with an excruciating new collection.


Augusten Burroughs burst onto the literary scene in 2002 with his best-selling memoir Running With Scissors scissors

Cutting instrument or tool consisting of a pair of opposed metal blades that meet and cut when the handles at their ends are brought together. Modern scissors are of two types: the more usual pivoted blades have a rivet or screw connection between the cutting ends
, which hysterically chronicled his unusual upbringing (his mom basically gave him away to be raised by her wacky psychiatrist). Since then the ex-advertising exec published last year's equally acclaimed Dry, a look back on his recovery from alcoholism, including a stay at a gay rehab. Now comes Magical Thinking magical thinking Psychology Dereitic thinking, similar to a normal stage of childhood development, in which thoughts, words or actions assume a magical power, and are able to prevent or cause events to happen without a physical action occurring; a conviction that  (St. Martin's St. Martin's or St. Martins may refer to:
  • St. Martins, Missouri, a city in the USA
  • St Martin's, Isles of Scilly, an island off the Cornish coast, England
  • St Martin's, Shropshire, a village in England
 Press, $23.95), a collection of shorter takes on similarly out-of-the-ordinary subjects. The Advocate talked to him by phone from his home in New York New York, state, United States
New York, Middle Atlantic state of the United States. It is bordered by Vermont, Massachusetts, Connecticut, and the Atlantic Ocean (E), New Jersey and Pennsylvania (S), Lakes Erie and Ontario and the Canadian province of
.

Magical Thinking is one of the most highly anticipated releases of the fall, coming hot on the heels of two straight best-sellers--but only three years ago no one knew who you were. What's it like to be such a huge success?

It's weird. I feel like Joan Crawford in Mommie Dearest--showing reporters her house [saying], "We just have a normal Christmas like every other family." [Laughs] It's been great. I wrote for years and years, every single day of my life, ever since I was a little kid. I've just always done it for me. To have a career doing it is hard to believe.

Well, in part, you can thank all the gay men who've been snapping up your books. Aside from the fact that you're gay, why do you think that is?

They're getting to read about things they do and have done themselves, and they're not having to go to the rainbow-colored section of the store to get it, you know what I mean? [Laughs] It's not marketed as "Here's a gay book for you gay guys! Hey gay, gay, come here, gay!" Being gay is a huge part of everyone's life, bat it's not the defining thing for most people, especially not in this century.

Yet so many straight guys read you too.

Well, I think that the things I write about are universal, in terms of what we deal with in relationships. It really doesn't matter if you're with a man or a woman. The intimacy issues and the sex issues and the insecurities--it's very much the same stuff. And I write about a lot more than just sex--whether it's childhood stuff or being an alcoholic and struggling with work or a missed opportunity at love, [being] single and dating in New York City New York City: see New York, city.
New York City

City (pop., 2000: 8,008,278), southeastern New York, at the mouth of the Hudson River. The largest city in the U.S.
.

One of the more hysterical stories in the book is about your experience at the Barbizon school Barbizon school (bär'bĭzōN`, bär`bĭzŏn'), an informal school of French landscape painting that flourished c.1830–1870.  of modeling when you were 14 and all the poses you had to learn, including a particularly sexy floor pose inspired by a Brooke Shields Brooke Christa Camille Shields[1] (born May 31, 1965) is an American actress and supermodel. Biography
Career
Shields' career as a model began in the late 1960s as an infant, and she continued as a successful child model throughout the 1970s.
 ad. Can you still do them?

Oh, God, I can, I can still do it all. It's just impregnated im·preg·nate  
tr.v. im·preg·nat·ed, im·preg·nat·ing, im·preg·nates
1. To make pregnant; inseminate.

2. To fertilize (an ovum, for example).

3.
 in my brain. I studied so hard, it's so pathetic. I wasn't kidding when I said [in the book] it was the most mortifying mor·ti·fy  
v. mor·ti·fied, mor·ti·fy·ing, mor·ti·fies

v.tr.
1. To cause to experience shame, humiliation, or wounded pride; humiliate.

2.
 fact of my life. It's horrifying. Deeply shameful.

Even all these years later?

It's just as shameful as it was then. Even more so, because you look at me and you're like, "Ha! A pointy point·y  
adj. point·i·er, point·i·est
Having an end tapering to a point.
 head and he's bald and he went to modeling school--and he looks like a tube." [Laughs]

What about Debby, the housekeeper you write about who practically extorted you--have you kept tabs on her since you fired her?

No, I never heard about her, never. But that little creature better not crawl out of the woodwork [now] either. It was horrible. She had just such an incredible power over me. I really was powerless over this woman. It was like I worked for her. I guess I deserve it for thinking I could even have a housekeeper in the first place [laughs].

You don't seem very domestically inclined, although I understand you and your boyfriend are building a house in western Massachusetts.

Yeah, with my brother on the same street. I feel kind of crazy, because it's so suburban. It's on a street with six other houses, and they're new, and there's kids in every house but ours, and sometimes when I'm there I'm like, "What the hell are we doing here in this suburban cul-de-sac? We live in a motherfucking cul-de-sac! Where did I go wrong? What happened here?" But I guess because I never had that, I fetishize fet·ish·ize  
tr.v. fet·ish·ized, fet·ish·iz·ing, fet·ish·iz·es
To make a fetish of: "The American public schools . . .
 it, sort of.

Although of course it never ends up being what you expect it to be.

Oh, no, I'll never be able to actually have it. I just talked myself into it for a while. "You want me to do a load of whites? I've got a washer and dryer right here!" [Laughs] And then I'll burn down all the other houses in the neighborhood and end up in prison.

Kennedy is a reporter for New York magazine.
COPYRIGHT 2004 Liberation Publications, Inc.
No portion of this article can be reproduced without the express written permission from the copyright holder.
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Title Annotation:Books
Author:Kennedy, Sean
Publication:The Advocate (The national gay & lesbian newsmagazine)
Geographic Code:1USA
Date:Sep 14, 2004
Words:789
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