This Tutu solid flesh.

DM Moscow's Bolshoi Ballet announced it was sacking the ballerina because she was too heavy. They claimed that avoirdupois was inflicting serious injuries on the few men who agreed to partner her. The ballerina, all of 5 foot 6 inches,. confessed that although she once gobbled cheese and ice cream, she now subsisted on greens. Ballerina said she weighed a mere 110 pounds. Management scoffed. Ballerina submitted to a New York Times sponsored weigh-in to certify her poundage. Ballerina stayed sacked. Colleagues claimed ballerina was a diva who demanded her own dressing-room. Gossips whispered ballerina consorted with Russian magnates and Hollywood movie stars. Ballerina replied that her enemies envied her popularity with audiences, muttered about plots, threatened to marshal her fans and to sue the company. The federal labor inspectorate ordered principal dancer Anastasia Volochkova restored to her position. She is happier, if not lighter. Maybe, she thinks, this is better than dancing with Ben and Jerry. Stay tuned for the next installment of the longest-running Russian comedy since The Inspector General.