The legend of Wild Tim.

RUMOR HAS IT Wild Tim was birthed from Wolves. Others say his dad was Adolph Hitler's personal assistant during the war, and his mom was a Jewish Navajo Indian. No one is really sure. What we do know is that he first emerged from the cornfields of Bend, Oregon riding tractors naked with one hand while pulling off layback grinds with the other. Pure insanity. Tim doesn't really speak in syllables--he talks in ethnic grunts, sort of like Tribal Pig Latin ... the guy is just way ahead. The first time we met Wild Tim was back in 'Nam, where he was welding bamboo and tin foil to make skateable spots off the coast of Bangladesh. Tim lived off ant juice and slept under submarines, just so he could skate without getting noticed by the Viet Cong. That's how hardcore this guy is. He once built a flatbar out of rice paper and a tooth filling! When asked about future plans or sponsors, homie's obviously not it in for the cash. He just wants to sleep on floors, drink beer with his buddies, watch infomercials from the '70s, and reach his goal to become Oregon's most aborted father. One time he was offered a fat wet suit deal from Bear Claw Wet Boards, but Timmy said the whole sponsorship thing just clouded his mind. I mean, the guy's kinda like Buddha. Wild Tim's bag of tricks include insane moves like layback crailslides, boardslide benihanas, hang-10 grinds on flatbars, and judo feeble grinds on handrails (as witnessed by an awestruck Chris Pastras). Chris was so blown away by Wild Tim's bag, that he had to rest under a trestle and be nursed back to health with coconut mango juice. He's still not really talking about it. He says Tim's skating is "country-soul slash", a style which Chris; predicts may not developed until 2080. Word bootie.