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The last word; 2003 IN QUOTES.

Byline: DAVID EDWARDS David Edwards may refer to one of the following persons.
  • David Edwards (football player and motivational speaker), inspired TV series, Friday Night Lights and documentary, "Beyond the Lights"
  • David Edwards (actor)
  • David Edwards (businessman)
 and DAMIEN FLETCHER

FROM the US "We got him" declaration after the capture of Saddam to Maxine Carr branding former lover Huntley "that thing", it's been a year of memorable quotes.

Who can forget Nelson Mandela coolly describing Tony Blair as the "foreign minister of the United States."

And Mohammed Saeed al-Sahaf may have started out the year as Iraq's information minister but, by the time Baghdad fell, he had been transformed into Comical Ali with his absurd predictions of US defeat.

DAVID EDWARDS and DAMIEN FLETCHER look back on the quotes of the year.

ROYALS

"I LIKE ties but I prefer not to wear one when I'm nervous."

Jamie Oliver, who wore an open-necked shirt to receive his MBE MBE (in Britain) Member of the Order of the British Empire

MBE n abbr (BRIT) (= Member of the Order of the British Empire) → título ceremonial

MBE n abbr (Brit) (=
 from the Queen, November

"IT'S a great honour for me."

What David Beckham revealed the Queen told HIM as she pinned on his OBE, November

"THEY are planning 'an accident' - brake failure and serious head injury - to make the path clear for Charles to marry."

Princess Diana in a note given to butler Paul Burrell, October

CRIME

"I'M not going to be blamed for what that thing in the box has done to me and those children."

Maxine Carr on Ian Huntley, December

Everywhere I go people cough at me in the street ..even the 10-year-olds

Major Charles Ingram, convicted of coughing to cheat on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire, November

"NO one has the right to kill."

Tony Martin, having served a prison sentence for the manslaughter of teenage burglar Fred Barras, July

POLITICIANS

"THE greatest threat to life on this planet that we've most probably ever seen."

London mayor Ken Livingstone on George Bush, November

"I HAVE been there watching badgers first thing in the morning. It was very pleasant."

Former MP Ron Davies denying a sex act at a gay cruising spot, March

"THERE is some truth in the media's claim that politicians are lying b*****ds."

Bernard Ingham, Margaret Thatcher's former press secretary, June

"WE are going to win the next election. I am not b********ing."

Iain Duncan Smith George Iain Duncan Smith MP (born 9 April 1954), often referred to as IDS, is a British politician. He is Member of Parliament for the constituency of Chingford and Woodford Green. He was leader of the Conservative Party from 12 September 2001 to 6 November 2003. , May

"F*** Gilligan."

Alistair Campbell on BBC BBC
 in full British Broadcasting Corp.

Publicly financed broadcasting system in Britain. A private company at its founding in 1922, it was replaced by a public corporation under royal charter in 1927.
 reporter Andrew

There are no American infidels in Baghdad. Never

Eccentric Iraqi Information Minister Comical Ali speaks as US tanks occupy Baghdad

Gilligan, from his diaries which were produced during the Hutton Inquiry after Dr David Kelly committed suicide, September

"MANY dark actors playing games. Thanks for your support. I appreciate your friendship."

Weapon expert Dr David David, in the Bible
David, d. c.970 B.C., king of ancient Israel (c.1010–970 B.C.), successor of Saul. The Book of First Samuel introduces him as the youngest of eight sons who is anointed king by Samuel to replace Saul, who had been deemed a failure.
 Kelly's email to his friend Anne Miller on the day he committed suicide

COMICAL ALI

IRAQ'S information minister Mohammed Saeed al-Sahaf deserves a section to himself for his aburd quotes during the war.

"NO American tank is in Baghdad. Never. Most were forced to retreat and the rest

were massacred."

"MY feelings - as usual - we will slaughter them all."

"GOD will roast their stomachs in hell at the hands of Iraqis."

"THEIR infidels are committing suicide by the hundreds on the gates of Baghdad. Be assured, Baghdad is safe, protected."

On Bush: "The Leader of the international criminal gang of b*****ds."

On US troops: "They are most welcome. We will butcher them."

SPORTS

"I HAVEN'T got big ears. I've got a very small head."

Gary Lineker, January

"SHE shopped 'til he dropped."

Tesco advert on the fact

Do you know who I am? I bloody demand that he's upgraded. Don't you know he's a millionaire?

Liz Hurley throwing a strop to get her lover upgraded on a flight

that Philippa Wilkinson was shopping while her son Jonny was scoring the World Cup winning drop goal, November

"IT was probably the easiest attempt I had all day."

Jonny Wilkinson on his winning field goal, November

CELEBRITIES

"HAVE a laugh for as long as you can and don't get run over. Or stabbed."

Ricky Gervais, star of The Office, December

"I DON'T drink these days. I'm allergic to alcohol and narcotics - I break out in handcuffs."

Actor Robert Downey Junior, January

"DO I look unintelli

I went for the gaffer. I don't know if I've ever lost control like that in my life before

David Beckham after being struck by a boot kicked by Manchester United manager Sir Alex Ferguson, February

gent? I'm not a model, I'm a Spice Girl."

Victoria Beckham, after she was asked if she had switched to a modelling career, December

"YOU'RE twisted. You're Norman Bates with a briefcase."

Coronation Street's Gail to her soap husband Richard Hillman Hillman was a famous British automobile marque, manufactured by the Rootes Group. It was based in Ryton-on-Dunsmore, near Coventry, England, from 1907 to 1976. Before 1907 the company had built bicycles. , February

"DO you mind if I take your photograph or will you sue me?"

Fan to Catherine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas, arriving at the Baftas, February

WAR IN IRAQ

"IT'S like Ferraris going up against old Austin Allegros. The buggers don't stand a chance."

Col Sgt Steve Bell on the tank battle near Basra, Iraq, March

"IF you are ferocious in battle, be magnanimous mag·nan·i·mous  
adj.
1. Courageously noble in mind and heart.

2. Generous in forgiving; eschewing resentment or revenge; unselfish.
 in victory. We go to liberate, not to conquer."

Lt Col Tim Collins in Kuwait, March

Ladies and gentlemen, we got himPaul Bremer, US administrator in Iraq, announcing Saddam's capture, December

POP STARS

"I DON'T want to go on stage with someone wearing a f***ing coronet coronet (kôr'ənĕt`, kŏr'ə–), head attire of a noble of high rank, worn on state occasions. It is inferior to the crown. British peers wear their coronets at the coronation of their sovereign.  and sporting the old ermine ermine, name for a number of northern species of weasel having white coats in winter, and highly prized for their white fur. It most commonly refers to the white phase of Mustela erminea, called short-tailed weasel in North America and stoat in the Old World. ."

Keith Richards on Mick Jagger's knighthood knighthood: see chivalry; courtly love; knight. , December

"IF I could tar and feather him and handcuff him to a lamppost in Piccadilly I would do it."

Sharon Osbourne on pop's Mr Nasty, who said that Ozzy's quad bike accident was a stunt, December
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Title Annotation:Features
Publication:The Mirror (London, England)
Date:Dec 27, 2003
Words:902
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