The impact of incest in women's lives. (Consequences of Gender Violence).

The feminist movements of the 60s and 70s and the new social awareness they produced in some sectors finally brought to an end the secret of sexual violence against women. The "conspiracy of silence" which defined adult society's complicity with incest was denounced, and incest became the subject of many studies on its possible causes and multiple consequences in the lives of those who have experienced it. A good deal has been written about this issue in the U.S. and, over the past ten years, in Europe. As a direct result, there is a better understanding of the circumstances and effects of incest on the psychological well-being of women and girls, who are the ones who endure the most pain.

Nevertheless, it seems that the same movement that uncovered the "conspiracy of silence" through sustained social and political activism has paid little attention to incest during the past decade. The issue of domestic violence has become the primary focus of activists and other groups which seek to eradicate violence from our lives. There must be a reason for this order of priorities. Availability of financing, perhaps? But whatever the reason, we must keep our guard up and we must continue to denounce all sexual violence against women and children of both genders. Domestic violence often has been linked to experiences of sexual abuse during childhood. For preventive measures to be effective, we must attend to the root causes first.

The word incest itself has been redefined according to the experiences of its victims. It is not only the dictionary definition of "sexual relations between blood relatives who are prohibited from marrying." This would only include incestuous events between father or mother and sons or daughters, grandparents and grandchildren, uncles or aunts and nieces or nephews. Incest is very frequent within family ties, but it also occurs between adults and minors who have a relationship of trust and authority. Incest survivors define this type of sexual violence as "all physical or emotional abuse of sexual integrity performed by a trusted person, during childhood or adolescence."

Based on this understanding and the findings from studies with the few victims who have denounced their circumstances and pleaded for help, it is estimated that three out of every five girls already have or will endure in the future some type of sexual abuse, most commonly from age five onward. In the act of abuse itself physical force is uncommon, but the abuser often will use manipulation, deceit, intimidation, trickery, blackmail and coercion in an environment of secrecy and fear of possible discovery. The studies also found that the younger the victim, the closer their relationship or familiarity with the aggressor.

The millions of women victims of incest endure a number of serious health problems for the rest of their lives. The extent of damage is shown in a 1998 U.S. study on the effects of incest on the careers of working women. The study found that in that year, of the 60 million women in the work force, approximately 8 million were incest survivors, a number nearly equal to the total population of New York City.

Since incest is the least reported of all sexual offenses, could we affirm that a third of all women have been victims? Answering this question is one of our great challenges within the women's movement. There remains much to do and much to research, especially in the countries of our region.

Psychological Impact and Possible Behavioral Manifestations

The most common emotional and physical consequences indicated by survivors of incest are:

I. Psychological/emotional

--low self-esteem

--guilt

--depression

--fear

--love/hate

--conflicts of identity

--loss of childhood

--shame

--a feeling of being different from others (or of being "crazy")

--mistrust

--rage, hostility

--deterioration in the ability to judge the responsibility of others

--confusion between sex and love, between giving and receiving tenderness

--split or multiple personality

--denial (of the abuse or of its impact in the survivor's life)

--phobias

--nightmares

II. Sexual

--promiscuity

--prostitution

--memories of abuse

--difficulty in becoming sexually aroused

--aversion to orgasm 

--phobic reactions to sexual intimacy

--"leaving" their body during sexual relations to avoid feeling

--pain during intercourse

--difficulties in setting sexual limits

--forcing themselves to have sex

--aversion to certain sexual acts that they endured during the abuse

--memories of the abuse during sex (triggered by smells, sounds, places, events, environmental factors, etc.)

--use of sex to get attention

--physical reactions during sexual relations (shivering, trembling, hyperventilation), also known as "the memory of the flesh"

--aggressive sexual behavior 

III. Physical

--gastrointestinal problems or eating disorders 

--gynecological problems

--headaches

IV. Behavioral

--problems relating to others

--relationships with abusive partners

--alcoholism/drug abuse

--self-inflicted injury or mutilation 

--suicide attempts

--over-protective or exceptionally lax attitudes towards their children

--self-isolation

--involvement in criminal behavior (petty theft or shoplifting are most common)

--vulnerability to future abuse

--co-dependent emotional relationships

--inability to express anger or rage

--avoidance of mirrors

--alienation from or failure to relate to their own body

--difficulty in setting limits

--feelings of persecution

--trouble developing trust, intimacy and identity

--difficulty in expressing needs

It should be noted that sexual orientation generally does not have a direct relation to incest or any other type of sexual violence.

Not all victims of incest show every symptom, and the symptoms that do appear are not always present simultaneously nor with the same intensity. The victim will be affected by many factors, the most significant of which are: the victim's relationship with the aggressor; age of victim at the time of the abuse; and how many times the act of abuse took place (generally, sexual abuse of a minor lasts for over a period of time); the elements of coercion used during the abuse (threats, trickery, manipulation, exchange of gifts or money for sex); and, if the experience was disclosed or discovered, how much support/protection the victim received. Incest is a terrible, heavy secret for the victims, a powerful reason for not seeking help. Those who do generally wait until they become adults. Add all this to the reality of the customary roles and social burden of being a woman in a patriarchal society, and it is no surprise that women are the top consumers of mental health care medications and related services.

Despite this devastating reality, my personal experience facilitating support groups has taught me that when incest survivors set out to find help and heal themselves of incest's impact in their lives, the results can be very encouraging. The process of healing is an extremely painful journey, but in the end the women are empowered and stop feeling, acting and thinking like victims or survivors. They learn to be free, for the very first time. Others are so afraid of confronting their pain or are so unable to bear their memories that they may have an emotional breakdown and decide to stop. Many of these women continue to meet, sharing a strong desire to work with and support other women who are facing the same dilemmas.

Proposals for Action

Considerable efforts and a good deal of money have been spent on programs for abused children. However, these worthy initiatives are simply not enough, and adult women are still left without services.

The challenge of the women's movement is to maintain and improve what has already begun:

1. Continue carrying out research and writing, using accessible, easy-to-understand and personal language.

2. Keep the issues alive by talking about them to all sorts of news media.

3. Take action on a political scale: lobby governments, show them the reality of this type of crime and its cost to society, encourage the development of public policy on this issue and new methods of enforcement. However, there should be no prescribed action regarding these crimes since only in adulthood do we begin to have the proper judgment to decide whether or not to report abuses that occurred during our childhood.

4. Integrate and expand, share the wisdom: create support groups for adult and adolescent women who have no source of help, in the workplace, as part of our work as feminist organizations promoting women's health. Group therapy with other survivors of sexual and domestic violence can be effective for many women. Through a collective and democratic approach, the secret is brought out in the open, and the aggressor's power over the relationship comes to an end.

5. Include men: there are groups of men who need encouragement to organize support groups for men who were sexually abused as children. Many more men than we could ever imagine have been victims of sexual violence.

6. Develop strategies of intervention and support for children born from incestuous relations.

7. Broaden the scope: all issues of sexual violence and domestic violence against women have to be taken into account in a more comprehensive fashion.

It is not a simple or easy task to heal and recover the girl who is our inner child in our adulthood. Once we achieve this, we can finally allow this girl to go out and play, feel and grow anew; we discover a source of tremendous enrichment and true freedom.

Special mention is due to my dear friend Gloria Mock and to my colleagues from Taller Salud Carmita and Laura. Their wise contributions greatly enriched this article.

The author is a founding member of Taller Salud, where she directs the Documentation and Information Center. She also works as a sexual violence counselor at the Instituto Puertorriqueno de Salud Sexual Integral (IPSSI, Puerto Rican Institute of Comprehensive Sexual Health).

Bibliography

Blume, E. S. 1993. Sobrevivientes secretas: Descubriendo el incesto y sus efectos secundarios en las mujeres.

Centro de Ayuda Victimas de Violacion. "Semillas para el Cambio" Boletin No 3 (San Juan, Puerto Rico).

Despues del incesto, cuadernos inacabados. 1994. Madrid: Edit. Horas y Horas.

Hass, C. 1998. "The effect of incest on women's career" in Incest, Work, and Women: Understanding the Consequences of Incest on Women's Careers, Work and Dreams. Leslie Beth Berger, ed.

Testimonies from incest survivors who took part in the support groups of the Espacio de Salud Entre Nosotras, in Madrid, Spain and in the Instituto Puertorriqueno de Salud Sexual Integral (IPSSI), in Puerto Rico.

Vanderbilt, H. 1995. Incesto: un reporte escalofriante. Toronto: Toronto Rape Crisis Center.

Waltz, W. and B. Holman. 1987. Incest and Sexuality. A Guide to Understanding and Healing.