The heavies: Chris Cole.

So how was 2004, bro?

It was great. I went on a sick Fallen tour. King of the Road, it was fun.

Okay, enough small talk. Let's cut to the chase! Take us through your day at Wallenberg, blow by blow!

Oh, jeez. I show up and I look at something that I definitely didn't think was gonna be as long as it was. I'd never been there before. I knew it was long but it proved to be longer than I thought. The roll-in helped but it was kind of crazy with all those people to even get your thing going. You could try and ollie it but you're probably gonna slam on that, so it's best to just go straight for your trick. I tried. It didn't happen. I was psyched. It was totally embarrassing.

What did it feel like when you set the three flip down perfectly and the tail broke?

Oh, when my pelvis separated? That one? I was kind of hurt for a second. It felt like my femurs had popped out on both sides. I just had to make sure everything was in its proper place and then I was okay.

If you could do any trick down it would it be the switch frontside heelflip?

No. I'd do the 360 flip. Everybody saw me not make it and I feel like a chump, so I want to do that.

I know it's probably a secret, but did you go back and do it for the video?

No. I haven't been back. Maybe I'll try and go back this week or something.

If you're going for distance, is the switch frontside heel your move?

For distance? Nah. I'd say the backside flip, because it feels better to be able to push it 180 as long as possible and then just sweep it up and know you have it.

Is Wallenberg bigger than the LOVE fountain gap?

It's about the same lengthwise but the LOVE gap is higher so you have more float time. Wallenberg you have to go really, really fast. You have more chance of wheel biting at LOVE, but more chance of coming up short at Wallenberg.

Tell us about the secret Zero video.

You mean the one that's about to come out?

Yeah. 'Cause, shit, when The Storm came out I was reading about it for three years before.

Oh yeah. I guess we had a lot of dudes--"we" like I own the Zero or something. Zero had a lot of dudes that not many people know about and they wanted to highlight those dudes and give them a video they could kind of run wild with.

The New Blood?

Yeah. The video's coming out good. It's pretty different from any other Zero video, but I think it's really good.

Who's the best of the Zero new blood?

Uhmm.

I heard one guy rips so hard his eyeball pops out.

Yeah. Sheldon. He said I could take out his fake eye but then when he put his face up to me I freaked out. I can't take out another man's eye! He took it out and it looks completely real. It's freaky.

Who else was a hot contender in 2004?

Haslam shredded. Duffel pretty much gets the longest parts in videos and probably gets the most coverage. Everything D Way does--you can bluntslide a 13 and it's pretty good, but this dude is over-crooking a building.

What happened to you on King of the Road?

I don't know, man. It was a fire pole of a rail that Tommy was shredding on so I thought maybe I should try and get biggest kickflip for Highest, Longest, Most. I kicked out and misjudged where the ground was, and dove in heel first.

Are you out for blood in KOTR 2005?

Yeah, we're back. We know what to do. We already went. We know how gnar the other teams are so we've got to step it up a notch.

What tricks were especially troublesome to you?

That wallride ho-ho. I definitely can't go upside down. Are you able to get through all of Mullen's text in the Tensor ads? I get bored.

I wasn't able to read the one about Daewon's whole video part. Usually I read them all.

What the hell is he talking about?

I wouldn't know even if he explained it to me. I need things much simpler than that. He's next level. I need Tensor Ads for Dummies. What was Grosso like?

He was awesome. I was worried at first. He's, like, a man. I thought he was gonna hate me so I was really nice to him. He turned out to be really cool and down for anything.

How do you decide which horrible band to write on your grip tape?

I used to spray paint "Hot Wax." Nowadays I get a marker in my hand and I write whatever comes to me, and sometimes it turns out totally awesome to me and other times it's ruined.

You know who really sucks? Nelson.

Yeah. They cut their hair and now they look like Meg Ryan.

Here are some more horrible bands for you to write on your grip tape: Trixter.

I've never even heard of them.

WASP.

Done it.

Blackfoot.

I've never heard of them.

They're like Indian metal or something. What about Man-o-War.

Oh, they're the worst.

Is the rock T-shirt collection still building?

No. I wear the same ones over and over.

What's in heavy rotation?

Children of Bodom. I buy the shirts extra-large and then cut them down to fit. Otherwise you get a heavy metal shirt that's all wide and short. It's like Danny Devito sized.

Are you guys getting rich off the Hot Wax video?

Hell no. We're getting poor off the Hot Wax video!