The College Aid Game.

Try asking a school's scholarship office, "Is that your final answer?"

When Simon Kendall was applying to college four years ago, he looked for a small, liberal-arts school in the Middle Atlantic region, knowing that cost would be a factor in his decision. Haverford College was his first choice--and it accepted him. But, like other elite private colleges, Haverford offers financial aid only on the basis of a family's "demonstrated need."

Less renowned but hungrier, Franklin and Marshall College in Lancaster, Pennsylvania, had no such restraints. It offered Simon a merit scholarship nearly half again as large as the $18,000 Haverford had promised, based on calculations of what he would need. To seal the deal, it even threw in a free computer and a $3,000 travel grant.

Last June, Simon graduated from Franklin and Marshall.

His experience shows how the once-orderly game of financial aid has become a free-for-all. Colleges that long viewed scholarships as a way of opening their doors to needy students now see them as tools for enhancing their own institutional prestige. And families of college-bound students are fighting back by using an offer from one college to squeeze extra dollars out of another.

Financial-aid officers say there's still the basic distinction between need-based aid (such as Haverford's offer) and scholarships based primarily on merit (like F&M's). In the socially idealistic 1960s and 1970s, the custom was to distribute aid funds according to need, and the most selective private colleges--although their ranks are declining--still hold to that principle.

THE BIDDING WAR

But even top institutions aren't above competing for the students they want most--defining need a bit more generously, perhaps, or making prized applicants' aid packages heavy on grants and light on loans and campus jobs. They're not above topping another school's offer, either.

"Our message to students is: If you get a better package from one of our competitors, let us know," says Michael Steidel, director of admissions at the selective Carnegie-Mellon University. Last year, his school received 773 such requests to revise aid offers upward--and acted favorably on 442 of them, with an average increase of $3,900 a year.

Today's college-aid game gives strong applicants a new card to play. But many in the admissions world worry that the purpose of scholarships is being blurred. Says Paul Thiboutot, dean of admissions at Carleton College: "We are not using limited funds in the most equitable way."

Playing to Win

Here's how to use the new rules to get the most help in paying today's steep tuitions:

1. Don't be bashful. If you're accepted by the school you really want, but are offered a better aid package elsewhere, don't be shy about calling up your top choice to see if it will adjust the numbers. Once that was considered pushy, but no more. The college may say no, but it won't rescind its offer of admission.

2. Visit the campus. Make your request in person if you can. That shows real interest.

3. Look beyond sticker prices. You may end up paying less at a private school than at a public university with few scholarships to offer.

4. Keep merit scholarships in perspective, A large award from the College of the Perpetual Magnolia may be flattering, but may also be a sign that it needs to "buy" qualified students.

EDWARD B. FISKE, a former education editor of The New York Times, edits the annual Fiske Guide to Colleges.