TO BE DODGERS GM, YOU MUST PASS QUIZ.

Byline: KEVIN MODESTI

How exactly is Frank McCourt, the new Dodgers owner, choosing his general manager? We know McCourt is holding face-to-face interviews with Dan Evans and potential replacements. Is there a 40-yard-dash contest? An ink-blot test? A quiz?

McCourt really should give the applicants a quiz to see if they know how to handle the difficult situations a Dodgers GM conceivably could face.

Make it multiple-choice.

1. At your first winter meetings on the job, a rival GM - let's call him, say, Jim Bowden - refuses to begin a negotiating session until a better-known Dodgers exec - let's say his name is Tommy Lasorda - is present. What should you do?

a. Call Lasorda to the room so the talks can go on, quietly express your disapproval to Bowden afterward, then make a pointed but dignified public comment vowing to always do business in ''a first-class manner.''

b. Call Lasorda to the room and let him negotiate the deal.

c. Challenge Bowden to a fistfight.

2. As a little-known front-office subordinate getting your first crack at a GM job, you know a lot of people wish the Dodgers hired a proven commodity. What should you do?

a. Go ahead with a major trade you believe is necessary although it will expose you to second-guessing, trading your most troublesome player even if he's your most talented - let's call him, oh, say, Gary Sheffield - for a clubhouse leader and a young pitcher.

b. Play it safe in your first winter on the job rather than risk riling the doubters.

c. Challenge the doubters to a fistfight.

3. You take over a roster that's pushing the owner's payroll limit and bloated by big-money dead weight that could be called Darren Dreifort and a huge-money old-timer that might be known as Kevin Brown. What should you do?

a. Do the best you can with the little money available to you, spending less in new salaries over the next two seasons than all but six other major- league teams but spending it well enough to keep the Dodgers in playoff contention into September.

b. Make up for the lack of available free-agent cash by spending precious minor-league talent to make trades.

c. Challenge the payroll department to a fistfight.

4. You take over a Dodgers farm system that, at the time, is rated among the weakest in baseball by all the experts after a series of bad drafts in the previous decade. What should you do?

a. Make a top priority of upgrading the farm system for the long haul.

b. Improve the farm-system ratings by over-hyping your prospects.

c. Challenge ``Baseball America'' to a fistfight.

5. Fans, talk-show hosts and columnists are leaning on you to produce a pennant winner now after 15 years without a playoff-game victory. What should you do?

a. Work around the payroll crunch by taking low-priced gambles on older players (we'll call them Fred McGriff), kids (suppose their names are Cesar Izturis) and journeymen (whose names would be something like Dave Roberts) in the hope of catching lightning.

b. Mortgage the future by trading those farm products for a hitting star.

c. Challenge Joe McDonnell to a fight.

6. The franchise's outgoing chairman, with a name something like Bob Daly, usurps credit for the farm system's renewed strength, saying it was ``my adamant decision'' not to trade away prospects. What should you do?

a. Say thank you, since the comment was meant as a defense of your nonproductive offseason.

b. Laugh, but only privately.

c. Challenge Carol Bayer Sager to a fistfight.

7. Prolonged financial uncertainty caused by Fox's decision to sell the team makes it difficult to transact trades and free-agent signings. What should you do?

a. Never complain, keep dialing the phone, stay optimistic in public that you'll find the players you need.

b. Delicately admit it has been a ``complicated'' offseason for ``every facet'' of the organization.

c. Challenge Hannity and Colmes to a fistfight.

8. The new owner announces he's going to interview possible replacements for you as GM but that you're a candidate to keep the job. What should you do?

a. Refuse to quit, ensuring you'll receive your half-million-dollar salary if fired, demonstrating the practical good sense the GM position demands.

b. Keep hoping the new owner will realize that while you haven't proved you're the best man for the job, you haven't proved you're not.

c. Challenge Jim Bowden to a fistfight again.

Right answers: 1. a.; 2. a.; 3. a.; 4. a.; 5. a.; 6. a. and b.; 7. a. and b.; 8. a. and b.

Wrong answers: 1. b; 2. b.; 3 b.; 4. b.; 5. b.

Kevin Malone's answers: 1. c.; 2. c.; 3. c.; 4. c.; 5. c.; 6. c.; 7.c.; 8. c.

I don't know if Dodgers GM candidates Paul DePodesta, Pat Gillick, Ned Colletti and Bowden would ace the test by identifying the most satisfactory way out of each of those difficult-to-impossible situations.

I do know Dan Evans would.

Evans already did.