THIS BORING 'DRACULA' IS THE KISS OF UNDEATH.Byline: David Kronke Television Critic Tonight's "Masterpiece Theatre" installment asks the question, does the world really need another adaptation of "Dracula"? After all, imdb.com lists more than 100 titles incorporating Vlad the Impaler's better-known moniker, many of them admittedly cheesy, but no less awful than some serious incarnations. The answer proffered by tonight's show is: If so, this isn't it. Recent "Draculas" have emphasized the sexual nature of the story, and so it goes with this one, adding the anxiety of sexually transmitted diseases Sexually transmitted diseases Infections that are acquired and transmitted by sexual contact. Although virtually any infection may be transmitted during intimate contact, the term sexually transmitted disease is restricted to conditions that are largely : Here, Arthur (Dan Stevens) contracted syphilis at birth (his father had transmitted it to his mother), which could translate into his own madness and destruction, which is a little more than bad news, as he's engaged to but is loath to taint the purity of the beauteous beau·te·ous adj. Beautiful, especially to the sight. beau  te·ous·ly adv.beau Lucy (Sophia Myles), to the consternation of John (Tom Burke), a doctor in love with her. Meanwhile, Jonathan (Rafe Spall), who's engaged to Lucy's equally sensuous confidante Mina (Stephanie Leonidas), is dispatched to Transylvania to meet Dracula (Marc Warren), whom we first meet as an old panting geezer geezer noun Medtalk American slang for an offensive and/or dull-witted old person, especially a ♂ in hospitals, geezer is a highly derogatory term for an elderly, cantankerous, often poorly-educated ♂ Pt verb with long stringy string·y adj. string·i·er, string·i·est 1. Consisting of, resembling, or containing strings or a string. 2. Slender and sinewy; wiry. 3. Forming strings, as a viscous liquid; ropy. hair, yellowing claws for fingernails and a predilection for sucking on photographs of pretty young things. Naturally, things, to put it mildly, don't go well. And things go exponentially worse once Drac, who cleans himself up almost reasonably well (still, those fingernails --), reaches England. Performances here are very staid indeed, until they veer over the top. Clumsy editing, clearly in fear of draconian FCC (1) (Federal Communications Commission, Washington, DC, www.fcc.gov) The U.S. government agency that regulates interstate and international communications including wire, cable, radio, TV and satellite. The FCC was created under the U.S. fines (the film is a British production), compromises the story further. The most recent high-profile similar project came from Francis Ford Coppola Noun 1. Francis Ford Coppola - United States filmmaker (born in 1939) Coppola in 1992. It was a bust, pretty laughably overheated o·ver·heat v. o·ver·heat·ed, o·ver·heat·ing, o·ver·heats v.tr. 1. To heat too much. 2. To cause to become excited, agitated, or overstimulated. v.intr. , really, but one thing it was not was boring. Which is essentially the word that describes this "Dracula." David Kronke, (818) 713-3638 david.kronke@dailynews.com DRACULA - Two stars What: "Masterpiece Theatre" adaptation of Bram Stoker's vampire classic. Where: KCET KCET Konami Computer Entertainment Tokyo (Japan) KCET Kamaraj College of Engineering and Technology . When: 9 tonight. In a nutshell: Too staid, or too over-the-top. No middle (burial) ground. CAPTION(S): photo Photo: About to be kissed in a very cruel manner by Dracula (Marc Warren), Lucy (Sophia Myles) is headed for serious trouble in the "Masterpiece Theatre" adaptation of Bram Stoker's "Dracula," tonight on KCET. |
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