THE WRITING ON (AND OFF) THE WALL ON CUE, ARCHER SHOOTS TRUE.

Byline: TOM HOFFARTH

Despite his name, Johnny Archer carries neither a bow nor an arrow when he walks into a room full of pool tables. All he's slinging is a lethal cue stick.

Archer has a creepy way of making a ballroom go silent when he makes an entrance with his black carrying case slung across his shoulder. It's because the No. 1-ranked player in 9-ball on the United States Poolplayers Association tour has a pocket full of credentials.

A four-time world champion, five-time Player of the Year, he's among the most recognized billards wizards on the planet (thanks to ESPN) and a fan favorite heading into the weekend conclusion of the Pro Tour Championship at the Bicycle Casino in Bell Gardens.

(The semifinals and final match take place today, starting at noon, followed by the year-end awards banquet.)

Although a round of golf may be less nerveracking for him than racking up pool balls - this from a guy carrying a 1.6 handicap on the links - Archer easily finds similarities between the sports, aside from the obvious smacking a ball with a stick.

``You really have to be focused mentally to do either one well,'' the Atlanta native said as he studied the action on several pool tables during a break.

``Pool may be less physical, but it takes the same concentration, figuring out shots ahead of other shots. Each shot is like a putt. My goal is to practice golf more this year, actually, because now that I live on a golf course, I seem to be playing less and less.''

Beats living on a felt table.

Before Archer had a chance to drift off into a mental game of drives and divots, we snookered him into the usual series of stupid questions we've decided is necessary to prove he has some sense of humor. Chalk it up to our inexperience.

In keeping with the 9-ball theme, here are nine must-ask questions we tried to sting the man they call ``The Scorpion'':

Question: Is it true you should wait 30 minutes after eating before jumping into a pool game?

Answer: I never eat much at all before a game. It just weighs you down.

Question: ``The Color of Money'' or ``The Hustler''?

Answer: Boy, ``The Hustler'' was good, but I think I relate more to Tom Cruise in ``The Color of Money.'' It's also a great movie to see some of the great old-time players do cameos.

Question: Bumper cars or bumper pool?

Answer: I hate bumper pool. It just seems stupid to me. I'm more into bashing cars.

Question: Ever use a Magic 8-ball for advice?

Answer: I've got my own superstitions. If I'm winning, I'll try to do everything the same. I always put the chalk in a certain place when I'm breaking, because that's when you need the most luck. When I'm racking, I have to do it in a certain order.

Question: Is is proper etiquette to refer to bald pool players as cue balls?

Answer: If I had no hair, I guess they'd call me a cue ball. I could see that.

Question: Ever had to go through nine balls during a round of golf?

Answer: Shoot, a long time ago, maybe I went through a dozen once or twice. If I'm using nine during a round, that must mean I've lost eight, and I don't let that happen.

Question: Did you mom ever tell you not to scratch, even if it itched really bad?

Answer: My sister really raised me after my mom died when I was 6, but I'm sure she warned me about scratching. It's not good to do any time.

Question: What kind of a geometry student were you in school?

Answer: Not good at all. Same with calculus. I know pool is all about angles, but as a general math student, I think I was pretty good. I could take anyone on the tour in adding and subtracting numbers the quickest. Just as long as there's no fractions.

Question: What's most important in a pool game, skill or luck?

Answer: I go back to the old saying that you make your own luck. You need some breaks to be successful on any given day, but the more skill you have, the more luck seems to come your way.

CAPTION(S):

6 photos, box

Photo:

(1) World and U.S. champion 9-ball player John Archer lines up a shot during a recent tournament.

United States Poolplayers Association

(2) no caption (Ashlee Simpson)

(3) PETE CARROLL 

(4) KOBE BRYANT 

(5) TERRY DONAHUE

(6) - New England Patriots linebacker-turned-record mogul Willie McGinest, in the current issue of FHM, about other athletes who have tried to put out their own music. McGinest, the former USC star, last summer started an L.A.-based hip-hop and R&B label, 55 Entertainment.

Box:

Sunday PUNCH

- Tom Hoffarth