THE WORST TV SHOWS EVER; Cheggers' naked turkey tops the list of awful programmes.
FROM the creaky sets of Crossroads to the dodgy gags of Love Thy Neighbour, Britain's 50 worst TV shows have been named and shamed.
Through The Keyhole, That's Life!, Eldorado and Family Fortunes all make the list.
Also languishing in TV hell are Emma Thompson's disastrous one-woman sketch show Thompson, and Triangle, a soap set aboard a North Sea ferry.
Topping the list is Naked Jungle, a bizarre naturist game show which featured presenter Keith Chegwin wearing a pith helmet and nothing else.
The list was compiled by writer John Naughton for this week's edition of the Radio Times.
He said: "The programmes I've picked all represent moments when TV went that extra mile to create something memorably rotten-whether it was an inspirationally flawed concept, a supremely botched execution or suffered from an unusually irritating presenter."
Seventies sitcom Love Thy Neighbour, about a racist trade unionist, is described as "a low point in British comedy".
While the Black And White Minstrel Show, which featured white performers "blacked up" to sing songs, is dubbed "an anachronistic obscenity".
Prince Edward's TV comedy, the Westminster-set Annie's Bar, is on the list alongside ITV's Celebrity Wrestling, Denise Van Outen's laugh-free sitcom Babes In The Wood and Davina McCall's doomed BBC chat show. The "smugathon" series A Year In Provence is credited as the series which "achieved the near impossible - creating a John Thaw vehicle nobody liked".
A handful of viewers may recall Heil Honey I'm Home!, in which Hitler and Eva Braun move next door to a Jewish couple. It lasted one episode.
Other dubious entries include kids' show Mini-pops and chat show Kilroy.
Naughton also singles out Thomas the Tank Engine which shows "a workplace riven by class envy, where bitching, brown-nosing and backstabbing are the norm".
TOP OF THE FLOPS
1 Naked Jungle (2000)
2 Minipops (1983)
3 Triangle (1981-1983)
4 Quickfire Balls (2006)
5 Annie's Bar (1996)
6 Wright Here, Wright Now (2002)
7 Love Thy Neighbour (1972-1976)
8 Thomas The Tank Engine and Friends (1984-1991)
9 Through The Keyhole (1983-)
10 A Year In Provence (1993)
11 Heil Honey I'm Home! (1990)
12 The Black & White Minstrel Show (1958-1978)
13 The Borgias (1981)
14 The Good Old Days (1953-1983)
15 Breakfast Time (1983-1989)
16 Thompson (1988)
18 George And Mildred (1976-1979)
19 Dream Team (1997-2006)
20 Ross Kemp: Alive In Alaska (1999)
21 Kirsty's Home Videos (2000-2004)
22 Clive Anderson All Talk (1996-1999)
23 Celeb (2002)
24 Diana: Her True Story (1993)
25 Eurovision Song Contest (1956-)
26 Celebrity Wresting (2005)
27 Babes In The Wood (1998)
28 The Edinburgh Military Tattoo (1952-)
29 The Girlie Show (1996)
30 That's Life! (1973-1994)
31 Family Fortunes (1980-2002)
32 Littlejohn: Live And Unleashed (1998)
33 Lock, Stock... (2000)
34 French And Saunders (1987-2004)
35 Alastair Burnet's Royal Interviews (1980s)
36 Eldorado (1992-1993)
37 LA Pool Party (2001-2002)
38 Heartbeat (1992-now)
39 Going For Gold (1987-1996)
40 3-2-1 (1978-1987)
41 Origami (1968)
42 The Gaby Roslin Show (1996)
43 Clive James' Postcard From... (1990-1999)
44 Davina (2006)
45 Kilroy (1987-2004)
46 Wacaday (1985-1992)
47 Fort Boyard (1998-2002)
48 Popstars: The Rivals [2002)
49 Flog It! (2002-)
50 Crossroads (1964-1988, 2001-2003)
NUDE AND BAD: Far left, Chegwin in Naked Jungle. Above left, Love Thy Neighbour, and above right, The Minstrels. Left, Thomas' MISS: Les Dennis in Family Fortunes