Soon there will be none.Marian had waited until Sunday morning Sunday Morning may refer to:
She sipped her coffee, unmindful that it had grown cold. Finally plucking up her courage, she parted the silence between them. "Frank--." Intent on taking apart the Sunday paper Sunday paper n → (periódico) dominical m Sunday paper n → journal m du dimanche , he gave no indication that he heard. "Can't find the sports page Noun 1. sports page - any page in the sports section of a newspaper page - one side of one leaf (of a book or magazine or newspaper or letter etc.) or the written or pictorial matter it contains ," he grumbled to himself in disgust, "for all the damn advertisements." Over the paper, she could see the upper half of his brown face creased in annoyance, and the crinkly hair graying at the top in a circle like a crown. Taking a deep breath, she said, "Kevin's coming home today." Abruptly he stiffened. Nothing about him seemed to move for a long moment. After a while, the words came out almost inaudibly in·au·di·ble adj. Impossible to hear: an inaudible conversation. in·au , "He's...better?" "No." She set down her cup. "Worse." His fingers loosened around the paper. Parts of it fell to the floor. "Why wait until now to tell me? His father." She shrugged, trying to make it seem like no big thing. "I didn't want to worry you," she lied. Actually, it was the fear of telling him. How he might react. What effect it would have on him. "Worry me? Considering all we've been through with the other one?" Sadly he shook his head. Leaving the half-eaten food on his plate, he got up from the table. "I'm going to get ready for church." She began to clear off the dishes, scraping the leftover sausage and pancakes into the garbage disposal Noun 1. garbage disposal - a kitchen appliance for disposing of garbage electric pig, disposal kitchen appliance - a home appliance used in preparing food garbage disposal, garbage disposal unit n . Sunday breakfasts in the past used to be family gatherings. During the week, it was usually get as one could. She took a hurried cup of coffee before leaving for work at the social services social services Noun, pl welfare services provided by local authorities or a state agency for people with particular social needs social services npl → servicios mpl sociales office; Kevin and Cal gulped down cereal and milk before school; and Frank, fortified fortified (fôrt adj containing additives more potent than the principal ingredient. with juice, would leave to give his football team an early workout prior to classes. She placed the dishes in the almond dishwasher that matched the refrigerator and stove. She would turn it on later. Then, picking up the paper from the floor, she neatly folded it back in order and carried it into the paneled family room extending from the kitchen. There, she put it on the coffee table. The large photo-graph of the boys on the mantle of the fireplace drew her attention. They were in college at Morehouse when it was taken--Cal, a junior, and Kevin, a freshman. Kevin looked pensive pen·sive adj. 1. Deeply, often wistfully or dreamily thoughtful. 2. Suggestive or expressive of melancholy thoughtfulness. as usual in his shirt and tie. He had her reddish skin with deep-set brown eyes Brown Eyes (브라운 아이즈) was a Korean musical duo, specializing in ballads. Although both members have powerful voices, they were initially disregarded because of their physical looks. . Kevin always carried the weight of the world in his thoughts. How he must be overburdened now with his own. Cal, smiling in his sweater with the big M on it, was the image of his father with a broad, round open face. He had just started growing a moustache. Easy going Cal was the one who had fulfilled his father's dream of becoming a professional basketball player. In his father's time, there hadn't been too many opportunities, no matter how good you were. Cal, the winner--until he finally lost. Tears watered her eyes. You give birth to them, you rear them, but you never dream they might go before you do. Isn't youth supposed to be synonymous with synonymous with adjective equivalent to, the same as, identical to, similar to, identified with, equal to, tantamount to, interchangeable with, one and the same as longevity? "Marian, aren't you going to get ready?" Frank was back in the kitchen knotting his tie, the hideous purple-and-yellow one he knew she disliked that clashed outrageously with his brown suit. Was choosing it an unconscious sign of pending confrontation? "I'm not going to church, Frank. I have to meet Kevin in an hour at the airport." "Ah-h-h yes, Kevin." He started to the back door and stopped, holding tightly to the knob. "I don't know Don't know (DK, DKed) "Don't know the trade." A Street expression used whenever one party lacks knowledge of a trade or receives conflicting instructions from the other party. if I can go through all that again." "I know," she said quietly. "No, you don't know!" His voice raised in bitterness. "You just don't." The kitchen door slammed as he went out to the garage. The wheels of his Toyota spun noisily in the driveway. Staring into space, she wanted to scream that she did! She knew what effect Cal had had on him--her. Constant changes that emitted sporadic miniature earthquakes in their lives. She shivered as memories created chills within her. She, too, was only just so strong. She plugged in Plugged In is a monthly magazine put out by Focus on the Family (founder: James Dobson) which reviews movies, music, general media, and pop cultural issues from a conservative Christian perspective. the coffee pot A coffee pot is a kitchen implement; a cooking pot in the kettle family. A coffee pot is also a container to hold freshly brewed coffee. There are many types and styles. . Something to warm the cold in her body. "Please, Jesus, don't let it be as bad for him as it was for Cal," she prayed aloud. The plane was on time, a crop duster crop duster Usually, an aircraft used for dusting or spraying large acreages with pesticides, though other types of dusters are also employed. Aerial spraying and dusting permit prompt coverage of large areas at the moment when application of pesticide is most effective and as the boys used to call it when they came home from Atlanta for the holidays. She stood waiting in the small terminal, hands shoved deeply into the pockets of her plaid woolen wool·en also wool·len adj. 1. Made or consisting of wool. 2. Of or relating to the production or marketing of woolen goods. n. Fabric or clothing made from wool. Often used in the plural. coat sweater hanging below her hips over the gray slacks. From the window, she could see the small plane landing. He was the last to get off, holding carefully to the rails as he descended the steps. "Oh!" The gasp slipped out. A woman wearing a floppy hat nearby looked at her quickly. "Are you all right?" "Yeah." She tried to smile. She was all right, but Kevin. Her heart sank as she watched him walking in a slow shuffle toward the door of the terminal with a book in his hand. Kevin held books; Cal, basketballs. His clothes were too large for him, khakicolored pants bagging around his legs. The jacket with UCLA UCLA University of California at Los Angeles UCLA University Center for Learning Assistance (Illinois State University) UCLA University of Carrollton, TX and Lower Addison, TX hung loosely around his frame, engulfing him. He looked like a scarecrow Scarecrow goes to Wizard of Oz to get brains. [Am. Lit.: The Wonderful Wizard of Oz] See : Ignorance Scarecrow can’t live up to his name. [Am. Lit.: The Wonderful Wizard of Oz; Am. someone had facetiously draped drape v. draped, drap·ing, drapes v.tr. 1. To cover, dress, or hang with or as if with cloth in loose folds: draped the coffin with a flag; a robe that draped her figure. with clothes to make it seem more human. As he came closer, it was his face that made her heart cry out. His motorcycle glasses eclipsed a gaunt face of an old man. He was just twenty-eight. Immediately, she realized that, unlike Cal, he had waited longer before coming home. Spotting her, he smiled and waved, "Hi, mom!" For a moment, she could say nothing, only fold his frail body tightly in her arms. "You're as good-looking as ever," he winked. "Stop trying to flatter me," she laughed, thinking that only this morning she had noticed the new pinches between her eyes, lines around her mouth, and fast-fading dark hair. "Where's dad?" he asked, looking around. She made a show of checking her watch. "By now, he should be home from church waiting for us while parked on the sofa in front of the television watching a game," she smiled. "Let's get your bags." "I just have two and some books." She wasn't walking fast, but she had to slow down for him, adjust her gait to his laborious movements. "I'm so glad you're here," she said, squeezing his hand, "where you should be." She knew it had been a hard decision for him, the independent one in the family, to make. When they reached the house, she saw that the Toyota wasn't there. Inside, the house was empty, but the television was on in the family room and an empty beer can sat on the coffee table. "Your father probably went to get some beer. I forgot to yesterday when I went shopping." "Yeah." He coughed a dry sound, averting his eyes. Upstairs, she went into an elaborate pretense of straightening up the room that had been meticulously prepared for his coming two days ago. Everything was in place, spotlessly clean. "Would you like to lie down for a while? Are you hungry?" Too many questions at once, she thought, exposing her anxiety. "I made that apple pie apple pie typical, wholesome American dessert. [Am. Culture: Flexner, 68] See : America you like." "Great!" He eased down on the bed, the same mahogany one matching his dresser and night table. The room continued to house his history with the Morehouse and UCLA pennants, high school diploma A high school diploma is a diploma awarded for the completion of high school. In the United States and Canada, it is considered the minimum education required for government jobs and higher education. An equivalent is the GED. , photographs and books. He had lived away for seven years. California was like another planet compared to this small Georgia town. He had just one more year to complete his dissertation--ABD, as they called it--while teaching in a community college outside L.A. Years of study's labor lost. Feeling physical and mental pain, he grimaced grim·ace n. A sharp contortion of the face expressive of pain, contempt, or disgust. intr.v. grim·aced, grim·ac·ing, grim·ac·es To make a sharp contortion of the face. . She saw him flinch. It was as if the pain had gone through her, too. When he pulled off his jacket, she could see the purple-brown spots on the back of his neck. It was a film replayed, flashbacks of Cal, but with another son now the main character in a similar drama. "I contacted Dr. Lewis," she said, busying herself with stacking pillows for his comfort. "You have an appointment tomorrow." "He was Cal's doctor, wasn't he?" "He's the best in town," she smiled reassuringly. Best to her because he was the most understanding, compassionate, concerned. he did not give a prognosis of death before its time. His tonic was hope. He was young, white, and, she knew, gay. Suddenly he burst into tears, sobbing, the weight of it all consuming him, made harder by the sight of her, the familiarity of the room, his guilt. "Mom, I don't want to "I Don't Want To"/"I Love Me Some Him" is the third single released from Toni Braxton's multiplatinum second album, Secrets. Written and produced by R. Kelly, this ballad describes the agony of a break-up. die!" She put her arms around him, consoling, steadying, attempting to impart what strength she had. "Sh-h-h. Let's not Let's Not is a science fiction short story by Isaac Asimov. It was first published in Boston University Graduate Journal in December 1954. It was written for no payment as a favour to the journal, and later appeared in the collection Buy Jupiter. talk about dying. It's living that concerns us now." "Excuse me." He got up, pushing back the glasses that had slipped down his nose. "I have to go to the bathroom. I go more now, you know." How well she knew. The accompanying diarrhea. She would have to store up on adult diapers and bedliners. She felt as if she could still smell the sickness in Cal's room down the hall. See the ghost of him lying there in bed. They now used it for storage because neither wanted to go into it anymore, remembering the horrifying debilitating de·bil·i·tat·ing adj. Causing a loss of strength or energy. Debilitating Weakening, or reducing the strength of. Mentioned in: Stress Reduction sickness that had wasted him. Spare this son, for after him, there would be none. She was in the kitchen basting baste 1 tr.v. bast·ed, bast·ing, bastes To sew loosely with large running stitches so as to hold together temporarily. the roast when Frank returned. He had changed into his old warm-up suit with Seatonville High Raiders on the back. Without looking at her, he sat the grocery bag on the counter. "Where is he?" "Upstairs resting. Dinner will be ready soon." Opening the refrigerator, he put a six-pack of Bud Lite and half gallon of ice cream in it. Suddenly he blurted out, "Damn, I'll see Cal all over again." Cal, the apple of his eye. Cal, whom they had finally gotten used to not being with them anymore. "No," she said. "It won't be exactly like Cal. Now we know what to expect. How better to cope with it--and each other." She went over to embrace him, putting her arms around a once trim athletic waistline thickening with age and less care. "Frank, it won't be as bad as before. We've learned from our mistakes." She tried to blot out the memory of his leaving them. That summer he went away right at the end of the school year in June. Disappeared without a word to escape the sight of his once strong son slowly dying from a disease that had yet no cure, no road to recovery, no odds. She had taken a leave of absence from her job as a social worker to attend to Cal, living off savings and money from rental property her mother had left her. She stayed alone with him, coping with The Coping With series of books is a series of books aimed at 11-16 year olds, written by Peter Corey and published by Scholastic Hippo. The first book, Coping with Parents, was released in 1989, and the series continued until the last book, Coping with Cash his fluctuating anger, despondency de·spon·den·cy n. Depression of spirits from loss of hope, confidence, or courage; dejection. Noun 1. despondency - feeling downcast and disheartened and hopeless despondence, disconsolateness, heartsickness , anguish, self-deprecating humor, and her own sorrowful sor·row·ful adj. Affected with, marked by, causing, or expressing sorrow. See Synonyms at sad. sor row·ful·ly adv. grief.
When he did come back, all he said was, "Marian, I'm sorry I'm Sorry may refer to the following works:
She felt him move out of her arms to go to the refrigerator. "Why us?" he asked, as if to himself, opening a beer. "Two of them. We brought them up right, didn't we? Knowing right from wrong." "We can't follow them through life forever, Frank. There comes a time when they have to make their own choices. Decisions. Follow their own ... heartbeat." Suddenly he wheeled around to face her in anger. "We've never had any like that on my side of the family," he flung accusingly at her. "Have you?" "Frank, how can any of us be certain who or what is in a family?" she snapped back, getting a paring knife out of the drawer to peel potatoes. She had surmised about Kevin when he come to Cal's funeral and brought Dave--handsome, blonde Dave, who sat closely beside him at the services. She was becoming more aware now, knowledgeable, having gone to the library to educate herself. She had learned a lot, too, in Atlanta where Dr. Lewis had advised her to take Cal in the final stage, for there were better facilities and support services support services Psychology Non-health care-related ancillary services–eg, transportation, financial aid, support groups, homemaker services, respite services, and other services . Staying with him in the hospital room with her gown, mask, and gloves on, watching over her son and listening while he talked with others like himself, she had grown more perceptive. She wasn't surprised about Kevin. When Frank had found out about Cal, it almost killed him. He didn't want to accept it. "Athletes are men," he raged, "not fucking faggots!" He would have rather it had been from needles. Cal's obituary read that he died from pneumonia, but everyone had guessed. The sickness itself told of its kind. Secrets are hard to keep in small towns where streets, houses, and people are closely interlocked. They had to endure the whispers, the sideglances; forgive the ignorant friends who came to visit less and less because they were afraid of "catching it," causing their group of friends to diminish into a thin line. Let trouble come, and you'll know who your friends are. Their longtime pastor told them that Cal had died because he had sinned against God's directives. After that, they changed churches. She put the potatoes on to boil. The sun was inching back into its bed in the sky, making the day grow dimmer dim·mer n. 1. A rheostat or other device used to vary the intensity of an electric light. 2. a. A parking light on a motor vehicle. b. A low beam. . Upstairs, she could hear the toilet flushing again. "Life's not fair to some," she sighed, going into the family room to sit on the couch On the Couch is an Australian television program formally broadcast on the Fox Footy Channel and it focuses on the current issues in the AFL. This is now broadcast on Fox Sports after the closure of Fox Footy Channel. The show airs on Monday night and is hosted by Gerard Healy. . "We have this to contend with in our mid-years when people are planning to retire, travel, spend time with ... grandchildren." He joined her on the couch, setting a beer can on the coffee table. "Grandchildren," he repeated slowly. "We'll never have any. No lineage." "We wouldn't have anyway. Even if ...," she stopped. "But we would have had them." She wanted to cry. They withdrew into silence as if for shelter from their words, thoughts, dashed dreams. Finally she said, "Frank, we still have one son left, upstairs, who needs us. He came home to us." Her voice softened. "Why don't you go up to see him? Talk to him." "What about? Having sex with men." "Frank! That was unkind. He's sick!" "Sick unto death," he muttered. "I hope it wasn't that damn white boy who gave it to him, that swish who came to Cal's funeral. White people have done enough to us already. Now they want to inject their sex poisoning into our race." She looked pityingly at him. "Scapegoats ... seems like some people have to have them," she said, shaking her head sadly. "Frank, there are black gays, too. Only the black community doesn't want to face up to it. They want to close their eyes and minds while our young men are dying. It's not sex or race. It's the sickness we need to deal with. Taking them away from us." She reached out to touch his face, feeling the tightness of his skin. "Let's try to remember how our sons lived, achieved. Made us proud! Go up to him, Frank, please. We're family." He stared down at the floor in thought, then back up at the television and the game he hadn't been watching. "I'll go up," he said wearily. "Take him a beer." "Take him love, too." Kevin was lying on his back in the bed, arms folded behind him, eyes focused on the ceiling. Hearing his father enter, he turned and smiled. "Hello, dad." "Hi, son." He patted his shoulder. He had never been very demonstrative LEGACY, DEMONSTRATIVE. A demonstrative legacy is a bequest of a certain sum of money; intended for the legatee at all events, with a fund particularly referred to for its payment; so that if the estate be not the testator's property at his death, the legacy will not fail: but be payable with his sons--a handshake, backslap back·slap v. back·slapped, back·slap·ping, back·slaps v.intr. To demonstrate effusive goodwill. v.tr. To demonstrate effusive goodwill toward (another or others). , an infrequent hug. A man's way. He stood awkwardly beside the bed. Looking down upon the shrunken shrunk·en v. A past participle of shrink. shrunken Verb a past participle of shrink Adjective reduced in size Adj. 1. figure, he thought, This isn't my son; it's his ghost lying there. He felt drained, old, and tired. "Brought you a beer." He handed the can to him. One beer couldn't do anymore harm. A beer between men. "Thanks, dad." Kevin pushed himself up, taking the drink. Beer was never his favorite. "You breaking training with this stuff?" he teased, flipping open the can. "Nope. I don't coach anymore. Just teach. Got too old to handle it," he half-smiled. The truth was that there had been too many losing games after Cal's death. He sat down at the foot of the bed. They sipped the beer while silently scrutinizing each other. "I guess it's tough, two of us in the family," Kevin said softly, almost apologetically. "It wasn't planned," he laughed, trying to turn it into a joke. The laughter choked into a cough. "Sorry, bad pun, hug?" Seeing the pain in his father's face, he added, "I'm going to lick this, dad." "Sure, sure you are. That's the Bryant spirit. Fight! Make that basket. Be a winner!" So far, no one had been a winner yet in this game. "I'm going to finish my dissertation while I'm here with all this time to recuperate re·cu·per·ate v. To return to health or strength; recover. . Brought all my stuff." He waved his hand at some of the books he had already taken out and put on the nightstand night·stand n. See night table. beside his glasses. "What's it about?" "The influence of Langston Hughes Noun 1. Langston Hughes - United States writer (1902-1967) James Langston Hughes, Hughes on the black writers of the sixties." "Sounds like a winner." He put his half-empty beer can on the night table. Finally, because he had to know, "You ever do drugs Verb 1. do drugs - use recreational drugs drug ingest, consume, have, take in, take - serve oneself to, or consume regularly; "Have another bowl of chicken soup!"; "I don't take sugar in my coffee" inject - take by injection; "inject heroin" ?" "A weed, now and then. Nothing heavy." He looked at him. "Cal wouldn't even do that. He was a great athlete." "Yeah." The trophies stacked in the trunk in his silent room attested to that. Out of sight, out of mind "Out of Sight, Out of Mind" was the 99th episode of the M*A*S*H television series, and the third episode of the fourth season. Written by Ken Levine and David Isaacs and directed by Gene Reynolds, it first aired on October 5, 1976 and was repeated December 28, 1976. . He would get them out tomorrow. Put them back in the family room where they belonged. Trophies to his memory. Kevin politely tried to make a show of drinking the beer. He didn't like the taste. It had grown warm. "You know, dad," he began, thinking it had to come out, to be faced, "people have different ... feelings. Cal and me, we just ...." "Sure, sure." He didn't want to hear anymore. He looked down at the floor, then back up at Kevin, seeing Cal too. It's the sickness, she had said. That was what mattered, not the other. "Kevin, you're my son," he said gently. "I love you." He was astonished a·ston·ish tr.v. as·ton·ished, as·ton·ish·ing, as·ton·ish·es To fill with sudden wonder or amazement. See Synonyms at surprise. at how easily the words came out on their own. Like they were just waiting there. He wished that he had told Cal that before the end, but the bitterness wouldn't let him. "Dinner's ready!" They heard her calling up the steps. "We'd better go down. Your mother has summoned," he laughed, getting up. He took the beer that his son had bravely tried to drink in companionship. "Hey, don't bother with this stuff. I got that cherry vanilla ice cream you like to go with your mother's pie!" "Great!" Seeing him waver as he tried to stand, he reached out quickly. "You okay, Kevin?" "A little tired from the flight, I guess," he grinned sheepishly sheep·ish adj. 1. Embarrassed, as by consciousness of a fault: a sheepish grin. 2. Meek or stupid. sheep . Frank put his arms around his shoulders to support him, feeling the tissue paper thinness of his shoulders. I can handle this again, he promised himself, I have to. My last boy. Suddenly warmth spread through him like courage. Impulsively he hugged him tightly. "We're on our way," he called down. "Father and son!" |
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