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Soap watch.

SUZANNAH (Karen Drury) and Greg (Mark Moraghan) finally get it together this week in Brookside, and boy am I glad. It has been coming for weeks now.

Nikki (Suzanne Collins) is still being followed, but is it Harvey (Edward Wiseman), and do we care?

I really don't like to go on about this, but I can't cope with it. So, I shall now ignore it. `Nikki who?' is the cry.

I'm glad I'm not the only person that hates the Musgroves. Another magazine featuring soaps recently ran a phone poll on whether they should be removed or not - who said my bill was higher than normal this month?

Niamh (Barbara Drennan) is still moaning on this week in that annoying as hell accent, and Ryan (Sam Hudson) is still trying to prove Luke's (Jason Kavanagh) innocence - but I'm past caring about that too.

Bev (Sarah White) is still providing some mad moments though, and at least that puts a smile on my face. You'd think nothing would the way I go on at times, but well, we all have these moments.

Anyway down at my favourite soap, EastEnders, two of the most irritating characters are leaving. Conor (Sean Gleeson) and Mary (Melanie Clark Pullen) are heading up north after Ruth. To Scotland? How dare they. Don't let them in, I say.

Simon (Andrew Lynford) is acting very rational this week, when he decides that the only way to see Courtney is to snatch her. Rrriiight Simon, why didn't I think of that gem. Grant (Ross Kemp)won't be at all angry when he finds out now, will he?

I mean, really. On a more serious note this week, Peggy's (Barbara Windsor) fears are realised when she goes to the doctors and discovers she has a lump in her breast. Her cancer has come back - will she have the courage to tell Frank (Mike Reid)?

Even the EastEnders are irritating me this week to a point. But it is funny watching Dot (June Cotton) and Lilly (Barbara Keogh) battle it out for the attentions of Jeff (Leslie Schofield) - but he only has eyes for Rosa (Louise Jameson). Lilly's great, and this week Steve (Martin Kemp) hits on the idea of enticing older people into the club with salsa dancing and Lilly thinks she'd be the perfect teacher.

However, Steve has more to occupy his mind when someone arrives in the square looking for Saskia. Oh dear, sins always come back to haunt you though, don't they?

Talking of things coming back to haunt you, are the EastEnders people showing their sense of humour or what? Every time Steve's sitting in the Vic, Duran Duran are playing in the background. And Martin Kemp who plays Steve just happened to be in Spandau Ballet - a rival band of the Durannies in the '80s. Funny, guys, funny.

Roy (David Nielson) opens his new cafe in Coronation Street this week, but of course things do not go well. I could have told you that, with Steve McDonald (Simon Gregson) involved in building the place.

A pipe bursts, flooding the cafe and Steve cannot be found.

It looked like Maxine (Tracy Shaw) was at last going to get a man worthy of her in Vikram Desai (Chris Bisson). But his sister Nita (Rebecca Sarker) warns poor Maxie that Vikram is not all he claims to be...

Sharon (Tracie Bennett) starts spreading rumours about the corner shop, as the competition hots up between it and the Kabin.

It might just be me, but I can't take to this Sharon one at all. The other week when she and Sally (Sally Whittaker) were standing in the street hurling childish insults at Kevin's (Michael Le Vell) new girl Alison (Naomi Radcliffe), it was cringeworthy stuff.

The big story this week is the custody battle between Kevin and Sally over their girls. Who wins? Not the girls anyway, that's for sure.

Marlon does a Full Monty in Emmerdale this week. How nice. Ross Kemp, or Spider, then yes, I would watch. But Marlon Dingle - no thanks mate.

Scott and Kelly find themselves alone in the bedroom that once belonged to Kim. Will the stepbrother and sister be able to stop themselves from going any further? Of course not.

Being a bit annoyed with all the regular soaps I took a wee bit of time out to watch Channel Five's stupendous Sunset Beach and The Bold And The Beautiful. Trust me, have a watch, and then we can discuss them next week.
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Title Annotation:Features
Author:Brown, Merle
Publication:Daily Record (Glasgow, Scotland)
Date:Feb 20, 1999
Words:751
Previous Article:Saturday tv.
Next Article:Daring to be daft; Don't Try This At Home ITV, Saturday, 6.10pm.


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